Here’s a movie that gets a 7 percent rating on Rotten Tomatoes.
New Year's Eve (2011) - Rotten Tomatoes
You’re welcome.
12.31.2015
If a guy sneaks in to Mexico from the U.S. is he called a dryback?
'Affluenza' teen held at Mexican immigration holding center
Whatever. Bring him back and lock him up.
How soon can you get to Mobile, Alabama?
If you can do it in 12 hours you’ll be in time for…
New Year's Eve: Ring in 2016 with 16 unusual drops
"More than 50,000 revelers are expected to ring in the New Year in downtown Mobile, Ala., at the city's MoonPie Over Mobile New Year's Eve Celebration."
If you can’t make it, well, there may be something closer. Click the link (above).
Can next year be more weird than this?
Jeb Bush said on NPR this morning that he "keeps a tiny Jesus in his pocket," just FYI
— Tom Tomorrow (@tomtomorrow) December 31, 2015
When you get old, everything changes
Even what stuff means. Like here—a New York Times article about the Donald’s poll numbers that refers, rather grandly, to every presidential election in this century.
Dude. That’s only four. For most of my life that same phrase meant a number that really was grand—it came to be 25—and a list of presidents that went back to Teddy Roosevelt.
But the Times’s list, now, goes back to Dubya.
See what I mean?
Let's get serious here
If it’s the last day of the year and your breakfast choices are a) Pretty Healthy Stuff (oatmeal with cinnamon and blueberries) or b) Good Stuff (a big banana muffin and a slice of leftover pizza), you’d pick the Good Stuff, right? Of course you would. It’s the obvious best choice.
Was.
12.30.2015
This is clearly not the time to make the internet even less secure
Massive Voter Database Left Unsecured
“An unsecured database containing information on more than 190 million US voters has been floating around the internet, and nobody seems to know how it got there.”
Looking at you, FBI guy. And all those D’s and R’s.
Not too cold but totally ugly
This was a snow with no redeeming features. None.
Also, this is another thing I promise not to do too much of.
What does it mean…
…when the personal injury lawyer doesn’t shovel the sidewalk in front of his office?
'Tis the season…
…for those year-end wrap-up pieces, and here’s one actually worth perusing:
2015: The Year in Visual Stories and Graphics - The New York Times
(Yeah, I know it’s from the Times and I know the Times is paywalled and I do too much of it—mostly because I do too much of it—and I’m going to be better about that next year. At least for a day or two.)
12.29.2015
Sometimes the first snow is fat and clingy-wet…
…and actually makes things look kind of nice for a little while before the reality of winter sets in, but this one…
…was ugly from the start. And wet—but heavy-wet, not clingy. Plus, the snowplow guy drove past too fast and buried my nice, clean sidewalk, and it had to be shoveled a second time. Bah.
Eighty-three days until Spring.
Eighty-three days until Spring.
Take that, 2015
New Yorkers shred away reminders of 2015 in Times Square - NY Daily News
"New Yorkers brought suitcases and carts full of old financial documents, lists of men who’d wronged them, wedding invitations, reminders of poor health and symbols old habits they're ready to kick — which they threw into a paper shredder."
New Englanders aren't really happy unless they're miserable…
…especially during the winter months, and today should—finally—resolve the accumulating anxieties piled up by the decadently balmy December just (nearly) past. To wit:
- Hazard types... snow... sleet... and freezing rain.
- Accumulations... snow accumulation of 1 to 3 inches... along with around a tenth of an inch of ice.
Per the weather service.
At 7:00 AM it’s still too dark to see clearly what last night’s damage was but it’s 24º out there, at least enough to put a chill into our Puritan bones.
Bliss.
12.28.2015
Who's that guy up on the balcony with the Donald?
According to a Gallup poll released yesterday, Donald Trump is tied with the Pope as the second most-admired man... https://t.co/Z3XDuS1t8W
— Robert Reich (@RBReich) December 29, 2015
I was in the Army when I could have been…coloring?
The Radical History of 1960s Adult Coloring Books | New Republic
"Mort Drucker’s JFK Coloring Book spent 14 weeks at the top of the New York Times bestseller list in 1962"
Here’s a chunk of history that blew right by me. Apparently somebody knew—just not me.
Running out of Netflix picks?
‘Worst movie ever made’ to join National Film Registry | New York Post
"Jerry Lewis, the slapstick comedian popular in the 1950s, completed “The Day the Clown Cried’’ in 1972, and it’s believed only seven people have ever viewed it,"
You won’t be able to see it until 2025 or so, but hey, put it in the queue.
12.27.2015
What would Leslie Knope do?
Historic Indiana Bridge Collapses Under Weight of Semitrailer | TIME
"The tiny overpass was built in 1880 and was 'one of the few things left in Paoli that’s historical,' Paoli Town Council President Michael Harkness told the Associated Press."
You’ve got to see the picture at this link (above).
What's with these Swedes and people?
Once again, giant Yule goat burns in Sweden
"STOCKHOLM — In what's become a Christmas tradition to some Swedes, a giant decorative goat made of straw was set ablaze early Sunday and police arrested a 25-year-old man suspected of arson."
It's not over until…well…it's not over
Chocolate Chip Mint: The Santa Effect
"The Santa elves, for the most part, take up employment elsewhere during the rest of the year (a large percentage of which pick up seasonal work with the IRS). However, there are a number of elves employed year round at the North Pole and it's high time we give them recognition for their efforts (in no particular order) by area of work…"
12.26.2015
Escher
I love this slideshow of our readers' all-time favorite cartoons. https://t.co/GJUjO6toRP pic.twitter.com/arXDE4Fjyp
— Nicholas Thompson (@nxthompson) December 26, 2015
Wait, she can say this?
This Photo of Kim Kardashian Shows Why Women Can’t Have It All | TIME
"Three cheers for Kim Kardashian, the Mrs. Potato Head of modern womanhood."
OK, now I’m really confused.
But anything for a vote
Hear the One About Jeb Bush’s Humor? You Have to Listen Closely - The New York Times
"He is a candidate so dry that flights of wit can become indistinguishable from a sober default setting."
The morning after
Dropped by the bank to play the ATM. There was a security guard outside, on the sidewalk. A guy exiting the bank as I was entering asked the guard how his Christmas was.
Uneventful, said the guard.
Uneventful, said the guard.
12.25.2015
Who needs reindeer?
Homeless stoners get free joints for Christmas in Denver | New York Post
"'’Cannabis can make a difference,’ is kind of what we’re standing for,' a stoked Dicenzo told the station. 'Merry Christmas, Happy Cannamas — would you like some rolling papers?'"
But what if nobody cares?
Onward Christmas Warriors ... - Heard on the Hill
"'I think it’s kind of funny that Republicans preferred fruitcake over Democrats,' Williams said. Among all voters, 38 percent said they thought the alleged treat was good, while 52 percent opted for ‘nah.' But 50 percent of Republicans and 58 percent of seniors liked fruitcake, compared to only 39 percent of Democrats and 27 percent of young voters."
Wait, what?
Male & female Reindeer grow antlers, but males lose them in winter. All Santa’s reindeer, Rudolph too, are therefore female.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) December 25, 2015
But you have to bring your own cape
What It's Like To Drink Bulletproof Coffee Every Morning For Two Weeks
"Its promises are multitude, at least according to its creator, cloud-computing pioneer and "Bulletproof Executive" Dave Asprey, who refined his recipe after trying a tea made with yak-butter in Nepal."
12.24.2015
And we're waiting to see how these guys vote?
Roadshow: 'Star Wars' signs enlighten Iowa drivers - San Jose Mercury News
"Cool and Iowa go so well together."
If you're not creeped out enough already…
Which Candidate's Holiday Gear Should You Wear This Season? - The New York Times
"This season campaign merchandisers have latched onto the Christmas sweater, knowing that if there’s one way to make an ugly sweater truly hideous, it’s by adding a candidate’s logo or image (the Donald Trump sweatshirt is sold out)."
12.23.2015
Too late to do much good, but maybe next year
Where To Say ‘Merry Christmas’ vs. ‘Happy Holidays’ | FiveThirtyEight
"Since Christmas is such a public holiday — people put out displays and pass out cookies, and they feel compelled to wish people some version of merriment — it is no surprise that reactions to it vary across communities. "
What Would Mozart Do?
Austrian radio jockey punished for playing 'Last Christmas' 24 times | Reuters
"Only once the moderator's daughter called the studio to beg her father to stop because the song made everyone 'mad' did he finish his one-song marathon, according to a video on Youtube."
Bad bird
Angry owl back in Salem, Oregon; 2 attacks reported
"Dwight French said he was jogging from his office to a parking garage Monday when he felt a bump on the back of his head. He turned around and saw an owl fly into the trees and stare at him. As he crossed a street, the owl hit him again and then a third time."
What a hoot!
Ouch!
According to @PPPpolls, the Grinch’s fav/unfave is 18%/60%, which is better than @JebBush’s numbers among GOP primary voters. #2016
— Peter Schorsch (@SaintPetersblog) December 23, 2015How many tries do you think it took to get this word through autocorrect?
The Right's Post-Constitutional Moment - POLITICO Magazine
"Rand Paul, who sells autographed copies of the Constitution, is a libertarian distillation of these concerns. He makes constitutional persnicketiness a high art."
Persnicketiness! W00t!
Shocker: College students complain about cafeteria food
Oberlin students think Americanized Asian food is cultural appropriation. They’re wrong.
It’s the middle of December—what took them so long?
12.22.2015
Clearly, we've entered the holiday slump
Giant comets may threaten Earth: astronomers
{Or maybe it’s early-onset spring fever.)
Sure she is; she just can't decide whose
Hillary Clinton Embraces Bill Clinton’s Economic Legacy - The New York Times
"At the same time, Mrs. Clinton reminds voters that she is not running for anyone’s third term."
Bunky, there is so much wrong with this line of campaigning it takes my breath away. It was the Clinton administration that brought us NAFTA and the greatly weakened banking regulations that helped set up one of the biggest crashes in history. Clinton disappeared poor people and merrily helped blow up the safety net of “welfare.” And that so-called “robust economy” he likes to credit himself with was largely buoyed by two big one-time phenomena—the rapid building out of Internet infrastructure and Y2K: in some substantial part, a fluke.
Bah.
And more's the pity
No Lightspeeding: Safe-Driving Messages Get ‘Star Wars’ Twist - The New York Times
"Gone are the days when the most memorable warning beamed to motorists was 'Drive hammered, get nailed.'"
Yikes! I’m turning into a conservative: The old one is best.
Gotta hand it to the PR campaign for this new Star Wars movie, though. It’s everywhere. Obama gave the movie a plug in his last press conference and I even read about it in the local paper—and all I look at is the front page, above the fold (the part you can see through the window in the box).
I'm not expecting this technology to make a big [sigh] splash
Piss in Your Socks, Charge Your Phone - The Daily Beast
"Basically, you’d urinate into a series of tubes connected to a pump in your socks, which is activated via walking."
–Thanks to Some Guy in Seattle
12.21.2015
Has Lindsey saved the day?
Lindsey Graham Tries To Stop Trump The Only Way He Can — By Quitting | FiveThirtyEight
"Even if Graham’s exit doesn’t change the contours of the Republican race, it’s a sign that there’s plenty of time for the race to change. As long as Trump is a threat to win, there will be pressure on candidates who are sucking up establishment oxygen to leave the race, and party leaders will be pushed to rally around one candidate. Stay tuned"
Once upon a long, long time ago…
Oil prices have now crashed through their 2008 low, and worse is likely to come. https://t.co/xHiyZDGZlR pic.twitter.com/cSUWZzexVE
— National Journal (@nationaljournal) December 21, 2015
…as long ago as, say, the early '70s, low oil prices were good. Now they're bad. What happened? The money changed sides.Today in WTF
The Stimulus Act Started a Cyber Crime Wave of Medical Data Theft - The Daily Beast
"According to a survey released this month by the company Privacy Analytics, more than two-thirds of health care organizations lack confidence in their ability to protect patient data."
If it's good, it's gotta get bad
New Englanders fear repeat of last year's historic snows
"BOSTON (AP) — A warm start to winter has New Englanders feeling wary…"
The Puritan dread strikes again.
12.20.2015
From the Tinkerbell school of politics…
"Clinton’s campaign chairman, John Podesta, and Jennifer Palmieri, her communications director, both acknowledged in separate interviews on Sunday that Clinton did not actually have a specific video in mind when she said that ISIS recruiters 'are going to people showing videos of Donald Trump insulting Islam and Muslims in order to recruit more radical jihadists.' But both insisted that the gist of Clinton’s comments about the Republican front-runner are accurate."
But she hasn't started baking cookies, has she?
Hillary made a lot of feminists cringe during the debate. https://t.co/Wkju7jil3W pic.twitter.com/S9d4e9sWur
— New Republic (@NewRepublic) December 20, 2015Well then, problem solved
Jeb Bush says he 'hated' being the front-runner https://t.co/lJPvWoWABn
— Washington Post (@washingtonpost) December 20, 2015
The D version of a Trump tale about celebrations in New Jersey
"They are going to people showing videos of Donald Trump insulting Islam and Muslims in order to recruit more radical jihadists."
Just one reason why (or why not)
On Encryption, Obama And Congress Want More Debate - BuzzFeed News
"'I would very much like to get to a world where if a judge issues an order, companies are able to comply with it,' [FBI Director James Comey] said. 'Either to unlock a device or to provide the communications between terrorists or between drug dealers or kidnappers.'"
Authorize a controversial technique to fight terrorism, next thing you know you’re also using it to fight drug dealers, kidnappers, child pornographers, “eco-terrorists,” income tax cheats…
With lutfisk?
Sweden's bizarre tradition of watching Donald Duck (Kalle Anka) cartoons on Christmas Eve.
"Every year on Dec. 24 at 3 p.m., half of Sweden sits down in front of the television for a family viewing of the 1958 Walt Disney Presents Christmas special, 'From All of Us to All of You.' Or as it is known in Sverige, Kalle Anka och hans vänner önskar God Jul: 'Donald Duck and his friends wish you a Merry Christmas.'"
12.19.2015
Bernie steals a play from the Donald's book
Sanders gets the fight he wanted - POLITICO
Yes, Virginia, the DNC is in the tank for Clinton and scheduling Saturday-night “debates” is just one part of it. Bernie needs all the exposure he can get and here’s one way to do it.
(And Clinton getting upset about the security of her data is pretty amusing, too.)
No place like DC for the holidays (errr, Christmas)
Lurking Within That Ominous, Omnibus Spending Bill - BillMoyers.com
"There is an unwritten rule in Congress that before you do even a little for the working class you must do a lot for the donor class. So while the $1.1 trillion — yes, that’s a 't' — budget bill now winding its way to passage contains some tax breaks for low-income workers, in reality, it’s a bonanza for Big Business."
(And also 20% of Dems)
30% of Republican primary voters nationally say they support bombing Agrabah. Agrabah is the country from Aladdin. #NotTheOnion
— PublicPolicyPolling (@ppppolls) December 18, 2015
You just can not make stuff like this up
"The 'holiday placemats for social justice' advised students on how to talk to their families over the holidays about Syrian refugees, police killings, student activism and the controversy over the 'house master' title which the University recently stopped using."
Losers take War on Christmas (WOC) international
Angry single men stage anti-Christmas rally in Tokyo - Al Arabiya News
"Anti-Christmas protesters calling themselves 'Losers with Women' marched through Tokyo’s streets Saturday, bashing the upcoming holiday as a capitalist ploy that also discriminates against singletons.
"'In this world, money is extracted from people in love, and happy people support capitalism,’ [sic] said the head of the organisation, formally called Kakumeiteki Hi-mote Domei, or the Revolutionary Losers’ League."
–Filed by our Pacific Rim bureau.
There'll always be an England
Slice of royal wedding cake sells for $1,375 - NY Daily News
"Bidding began at $1,100 for what the auction house described as 'classic British fruitcake with cream cheese frosting.'"
12.18.2015
Feel the Bern
BREAKING: Sanders presidential campaign files lawsuit to regain access to Democratic Party voter data.
— The Associated Press (@AP) December 18, 2015
Might be missing a few (I don't always remember to click)
But in case you missed the when they scrolled down the list…
OK, partially weirdo then
Kidless adults in Portland, Ore., are waiting 90 minutes to visit Hipster Santa
"A little further back in line was Summer Michaud-Skog, a nanny who went to see Hipster Santa with her 5-year-old charge. She was glad for the excuse to come to the mall to see Santa because she didn’t want to go by herself 'like a total weirdo,' though she did notice plenty of adults in line without kids."
Deck stacked
"'We’re playing the hand we were dealt,' said Michael Briggs, a spokesman for Mr. Sanders. 'I guess Christmas Eve was booked.'"
In Virginia, terrorist penmanship
Entire school district closed over calligraphy lesson | New York Post
"Anger over the lesson has escalated since a teacher at Riverheads High School had students in her class complete an assignment one week ago. It involved practicing calligraphy and writing a statement in Arabic."
Shocker! Hillary data compromised on the internet!
"The Democratic National Committee has told the campaign of Senator Bernie Sanders of Vermont that it was suspending its access to its voter database after a software error enabled at least one of his staff members to review Hillary Clinton’s private campaign data."
These people have no business even working for the government, let alone leading it. We need people who, at the very least, know what century we’re in.
Grrr.
Keeping America safe, one Aikido Master at a time
Aikido Master Demonstrates The One Self-Defense Move Everyone Needs To Know
[Noted by Some Guy in Seattle.]
Doesn't beat a big box of cookies, but OK
The Norwegian plan to gift Finland a mountain - The Washington Post
"Dubbing their project 'Halti as an anniversary gift,' the organizers say that Norway should give Finland the peak of the mountain to celebrate the 100-year anniversary of Finland's declaration of independence from the Russian Republic in 1917."
Finally, what I want to be when I grow up
“…chocolate reviewer Georg Bernardini wrote…"
A chocolate reviewer! What kind of great job would that be?
(And also, not exactly, it seems.)
12.17.2015
And how's that working out?
Gun safety instructor shoots pastor during demonstration in California - CBS News
"The shooting incident comes at a time when church members in California are training to carry concealed weapons in response to recent mass shootings…"
Maybe he should become a retired presidential candidate too
Ben Carson: "Very likely would be a one-term president" - CBS News
"Retired neurosurgeon Ben Carson believes that he would only serve in the White House for a single term if he wins the 2016 presidential election, saying that unpopular policies he plans to enact would sink any chances of getting elected a second time."
Now the go-to way to get out of a test?
Anacostia High School in D.C. evacuated over bomb threat - Washington Times
Happened at UCONN a week or so ago. And then, of course, Los Angeles the other day…
What hath Tom Crapper wrought?
Japan has a thing for toilets, and now a dedicated museum - The Washington Post
"The government this year launched the Japan Toilet Prize, part of a campaign to improve quality of life by improving the quality of restrooms."
We ran across this quote from Jeb!…
…in a New York Times editorial this morning—addressing a National Rifle Association convention in 2003 he "exuberantly declared [the Times words there]:
“The sound of our guns is the sound of freedom!”
Meanwhile, this piece from The Atlantic, about the history of the Second Amendment, is well worth reading:
The Misguided Second Amendment Interpretations of Justices Scalia and Thomas - The Atlantic
" The history of the Second Amendment…supports a robust public power to regulate guns for reasons of public safety."
12.16.2015
In a galaxy far, far away
Ipsos Calls 2016 Election for Obi Wan Kenobi | Ipsos
"In a head-to-head matchup among Millennials: Yoda (50%) would beat Hillary Clinton (26%) handily. Even among the general public, the margin is 41% for the candidate from Dagobah and 25% for Clinton"
Hey, never too young to learn
Police could hack any device, even toys, under UK surveillance draft bill https://t.co/6fZn9hgofG
— Blogs of War (@BlogsofWar) December 16, 2015And why would we want to bomb the carpets anyway?
Ted Cruz misfires on definition of 'carpet bombing' in GOP debate | PolitiFact
"What Cruz described isn’t carpet bombing. What he described is actually the opposite of carpet bombing."
Maybe we should put these guys on some kind of watch list too
Is Cruz In Trouble for Leaking Classified Info?
"It's impossible from the outside to know whether or not Cruz did in fact release protected information. We don't know the details of what was being discussed or which parts of it are considered classified. As with the controversy over Hillary Clinton's emails, much of the question itself is shot through with politics, inherent ambiguity and as often as not dealing with information which may be technically classified but shouldn't be because of rampant over-classification."
R's join Clinton on encryption
In last night’s CNN debate the R’s—all the R’s who matter, anyway—joined Clinton (and the other D candidates as well) in supporting government access to encrypted communications, an outrageously stupid, unqualified disaster of an idea which disqualifies them from being president or holding any other government job. Period.
Providing the government with access to encrypted communications, for whatever reason, would involve either building a weakness—a “back door”—into encryption software or providing a “front door” in the form of some kind of master key. Both of these approaches are terrible ideas because—as Edward Snowden and his merry band of accomplices have clearly demonstrated—even the most closely-held secrets will out in the end. Information wants to be free, as the geeks of old proclaimed.
And when that happens, when the back doors and keys are generally known, the internet will be useless for anything except transmitting pictures of cats and Kardashians. (And even that will be risky—see “steganography.”)
We need a new candidate who understands the 21st Century, and quick.
A breath of fresh air
Beijing's Air Is So Bad, the Sale of Bottled Canadian Mountain Air Is Soaring | VICE News
"And Vitality Air isn't the only business capitalizing on the smog. On Monday, a restaurant in Jiangsu Province was caught adding an 'air cleaning fee' to customers' bills, some media reported. "
12.15.2015
When you run out of ideas
And I mean really, totally, completely, end-of-the-world out and nothing, nothing, makes any sense any more…
And if not, he may just explode
Trump’s doctor says health is ‘astonishingly excellent' - NY Daily News
"Donald Trump’s personal doctor claims GOP front-runner’s health is ‘astonishingly excellent’ — ‘If elected ... will be the healthiest individual ever elected to the presidency’"
You know where this is going, right?
The best funny, clever, or offensive science paper titles.
1) Head and Neck Injury Risks in Heavy Metal: Head Bangers Stuck Between Rock and a Hard Bass
2) A Lucky Catch: Fishhook Injury of the Tongue.
3) Crazy Like a Fox: Validity and Ethics of Animal Models of Human Psychiatric Disease.
Right. To our work avoidance hotlist, as soon as we get a round tuit.
12.14.2015
Narrowing things right down
Polls Suggest Trump Will Win Between 8 Percent And 64 Percent Of The Vote | FiveThirtyEight
Why even bother with an election then?
Back to the future in Iowa
Our Iowa poll coming tomorrow finds by a 27 point margin that Trump voters think Japanese internment was good
— PublicPolicyPolling (@ppppolls) December 14, 2015I've run across some pretty bad team names, but…
Hoggers record 3 blowout wins in Scholar Roundball Classic | The Recorder
"The Northfield Mount Hermon School boys’ basketball team had another good weekend as the Hoggers won all three games they played at the Scholar Roundball Classic at Babson College in Wellesley."
…Hoggers? Really?
Dude, this will absolutely not end well
Google’s chairman wants algorithms to censor the internet for hate speech - Quartz
"'It’s our responsibility to demonstrate that stability and free expression go hand in hand,' he writes. 'We should build tools to help de-escalate tensions on social media—sort of like spell-checkers, but for hate and harassment.'
"His words came just after Hillary Clinton, the frontrunner for the Democratic presidential nomination, called on Silicon Valley to 'disrupt ISIL' last weekend in Washington DC. Clinton said it is crucial to 'deprive jihadists of virtual territory' by shutting off their means of communication."
[Emphasis added.]
12.13.2015
Trump: Not wrong every time
Trump To Republicans: 'I'm Sorry I Did This To You'
"'Look, I understand what they're going through. I wasn't supposed to be here. I was a member of the establishment seven months ago,' Trump said. 'I’m not supposed to be doing this. You see I’m supposed to be on the other side writing checks and having people do whatever I want, puppets, like puppets.'"
Allay away
Obama aims to allay concerns about terror-fighting strategy
"Obama's schedule includes a Monday stop at the Pentagon for a rare meeting outside the White House by his National Security Council…"
Anything can happen in DC
Carl Hiaasen: Bulletin — Rubio sighting in the Capitol | Miami Herald
"The Senate was considering a law to prevent persons on the FBI’s terror watch list from buying explosives or guns. To most Americans, that’s a no-brainer.
"Rubio showed up to vote against the bill. Went out of his way to vote against it.
"This was only one day after the mass shootings in San Bernardino."
Bold in Badgerland
Wisconsin Regents Back Free Speech - The New York Times
"As the meeting drew to a close, the students stood and demanded to talk. One of them read a speech about how the resolution would open the door to hate speech. The regents ignored him and made their closing remarks as he continued to shout."
12.12.2015
Major Bowes' Amateur Hour was the American Idol of 1930s and 40s radio
And the winner of the first year was…
In 1935, the first year of radio network broadcasts of Major Bowes’ Amateur Hour, more than thirty thousand acts auditioned for the talent contest program. One of the successful acts was the “Hoboken Four.” The vocal quartet auditioned as “Frank Sinatra and the 3 Flashes,” but was renamed, purportedly by Major Bowes himself. The act won the competition of the September 8, 1935, broadcast and joined one of Major Bowes’s traveling vaudeville units. Sinatra soon left the tour to strike out on his own.Library of Congress
Remember those good old days…
…those golden days, when the Republicans (and Fox News) were badgering the Donald about staying in the party, wanting him to swear he’d never leave? Now it’s not the Donald that’s making waves, it’s that Ben
GOP presidential candidate Ben Carson threatens to leave Republican Party - LA Times
"The retired neurosurgeon lashed out at Republican leaders who discussed the possibility of a 'brokered convention' during a recent private dinner in Washington."
But good news! Some guy named Sean Spicer, the person in charge of answering Republican prayers, made everything better.
"Republican National Committee spokesman Sean Spicer responded, 'His prayers have been answered,' adding that it's ultimately the voters who will decide on the Republican nominee."
Imagine our relief!
Ooops
Firefighters spray wrong plane with foam at Chinese airport | Miami Herald
"When crew members of a passenger plane reported sparks coming from an engine while taxiing at an airport in southern China, eight fire trucks responded within minutes.…"
So now, instead of obsessing about next year's iPhone (or president)…
There’s An 85 Percent Chance The Cubs Won’t Win The World Series Next Year Either | FiveThirtyEight
"But for now, the Cubs are MLB’s best team — on paper, at least."
Why not Trump the Whole Bunch?
The App That Lets You Block Trump-Related News
"for anyone put off by his recent remarks, the only way to 'trump Trump,' might be to not to reward him with attention, but to block him entirely. Luckily, an iOS app named 'Trump Trump,' does just that."
12.11.2015
Oops, there goes your tuition bill
College sports’ fastest-rising expense: Paying coaches not to work - The Washington Post
"So far this fiscal year (which runs through next summer) Maryland is one of five Power Five athletic departments that have racked up severance obligations that could run as high as $25.6 million combined, records show, after changing coaches and administrators."
Picky, picky
Ivy-grad lobbyist who's worked for all 3 branches of gov't runs for office as outsider: https://t.co/K8yx2QGLBu pic.twitter.com/K3z0zaHbbR
— The Slatest (@slatest) December 11, 2015
This is the end of civilization for sure…
Brits who don’t recognize an umbrella when they see one.
Terror alert in London following umbrella mistake on bus - NY Daily News
OK, what?
The Scary Mental Health Risks of Going Meatless | Women's Health
"New research suggests that along with shedding pounds, slashing cancer risk, and boosting life expectancy, vegetarianism could come with lesser-known side effects: Panic attacks. OCD. Depression.…"
I'm no expert (but since when has that stopped me, right?)
I’m just saying here…somehow, if your exercise plan consists of walking to the bakery and back…
and the bakery makes excellent scones…
What a way to start a day
Republicans, Guns and Abortion - Gail Collins, The New York Times
"The presidential race has degenerated to the point where I am going to attempt to cheer you up by talking about abortion and guns."
And…
Goose-Steppers in the G.O.P. - Timothy Egan, The New York Times
"The neo-Nazi website, Daily Stormer, was out and proud earlier this week: 'Heil Donald Trump — the Ultimate Savior.’"
Achtung, bitches
VW Says Emissions Cheating Was Not a One-Time Error - The New York Times
"“There was a tolerance for breaking the rules,” Mr. Pötsch said…"
Ve vill haf no breaking of der rules.
12.10.2015
Pardon our complete surprise
Poll: After Paris attacks, millennials want ground troops to fight ISIS - CBS News
"The kicker: Young Americans aren't so eager for a ground campaign that they want to carry out the fight themselves."
The revolution will be monitized
Twitter looks to make money from ads aimed at logged-out users | Reuters
"Twitter Inc said it was testing a feature to show advertisements to people who read tweets without logging in, as it tries to make good on its long-time ambition to monetize non-active users."
Today in First World Problems
Find out what your nanny’s really up to when you’re not around | New York Post
“[A} nanny spy, Limor Weinstein, a 40-year-old UES mom of three girls, charges $350 an hour to surveil unsuspecting nannies, including stalking a single nanny for as long as six weeks."
I wish they would at least agree on what to call this thing…
Four Plans Compete to Authorize Military Force Against the Islamic State - The New York Times
"Members of Congress have criticized President Obama’s response to the Islamic State — also known as the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant, ISIL, or ISIS…"
…before they make me crazy, also known as nuts, or freaking bonkers.
This day has been so weird you wouldn't believe
See? I’m starting to talk like Trump. And that’s not even the worst part. Never mind—were talking about incredibly, unbelievably, overwhelmingly, unambiguously totally weird. And tomorrow gonna be pretty dodgy too. Computers crashing in flames, cookie shortage, you name it.
Me, I’m putting on some nice, cozy sweats and sitting right here with a book and, well, this for the rest of the afternoon and if you don’t like it, tough.
Humph.
Ft. Laramie comes to Jalalabad
As It Fights ISIS, Pentagon Seeks String of Bases Overseas - The New York Times
"The plan would all but ensure what Pentagon officials call an 'enduring' American military presence in some of the world’s most volatile regions."
If you want to stay on top of this strategy you’d do well to study the history of America’s (mostly) 19th Century (I know we don’t say things like this anymore) Indian Wars.
From Wikipedia:
"The Census Bureau in 1894 counted over 40 wars during the 57 years between 1789 and 1846, which killed 19,000 whites and about 30,000 Indians however it did note that the number of Indians killed was likely 50% higher than this, for a total of 45,000."
Notes from another time
From George Orwell's 1940 review of Mein Kampf:
Hitler…knows that human beings don’t only want comfort, safety, short working-hours, hygiene, birth-control and, in general, common sense; they also, at least intermittently, want struggle and self-sacrifice, not to mention drums.
Obama: The gun president?
What Drives Gun Sales: Terrorism, Obama and Calls for Restrictions - The New York Times
"'President Obama has actually been the best salesman for firearms,' said Brian W. Ruttenbur, an analyst with BB&T Capital Markets, a financial services firm."
12.09.2015
Another fabulous idea from Texas
"Let me reiterate: Gun rights activists are planning, a mere week after the San Bernardino shooting, to stage a fake mass shooting at a major public university campus to showcase their displeasure with the idea of gun-free zones. "
Why?
"'We love freedom and we’re trying to make more freedom,' Short told the Statesman."
Got it.
Have you ever walked out of a store…
Woman who shot at fleeing shoplifters gets probation - seattlepi.com
"She acknowledged the shooting in the parking lot was a mistake.…
"'We need more people like Tatiana Duva-Rodriguez in our society,’ [her defense attorney] said."
…and triggered an alarm because the clerk forgot to remove one of those little tags?
Oughta be better than a Superman movie
Ted Cruz’s Plan for Toppling Donald Trump in South Carolina? Divine Intervention
"And in South Carolina, which has a long history of nasty primaries—the brutal struggle between John McCain and George W. Bush in 2000 being among the most notorious—many anticipate a colossal struggle."
This is just plain depressing
Not the Donald, although he’s pretty depressing himself, but…
Along with Trump’s rhetoric, the stakes for 2016 have risen dramatically - The Washington Post
"One must scroll back decades for echoes, however imperfect, of what he is saying, from the populist and racially based appeals of then-Alabama Gov. George Wallace in 1968 and 1972…"
…learning that WaPo considers 1972 is no longer in the modern era.
New York Wings (no, not a new basketball team no matter how much you wish)
Dad, son swipe $41K worth of wings | New York Post
“…sold them on the street or to other businesses."
Where else could you sell a box of chicken wings on the street (pssst, buddy)?
12.08.2015
After us, of course…
For the latest from the world’s most unstoppable media juggernaut, visit https://t.co/csf5QTTFPD. pic.twitter.com/ApLDCqgJjo
— The Onion (@TheOnion) December 8, 2015
What? No yurts?
San Jose council explores tent city idea to house homeless - San Jose Mercury News
"'The current circumstances warrant us taking a very aggressive approach,' said Councilman Donald Rocha"
Swabbie nun whacks deer
Nun Sister Bauer Shoots 10-Point Buck In Pennsylvania | The Daily Caller
"Sister John Paul Bauer — who learned to shoot while serving in the Navy — has been hunting for a few years and says there’s something spiritual about the sport."
(A veritable festival of outrage.)
Inflation
Sheriff calls on America's "good guys" to shoot "bad guys"
In a Facebook message that has since gone viral, the sheriff said said he was "sick and tired" of terrorists who just want 'their 15 minutes of fame.’"
Actually now it’s more like a week on CNN.
Not the kind that sells cookies, the kind that is a cookie (sort of)
Who doesn’t like brownies? - Toledo Blade
"It’s National Brownie Day, an important occasion we know you’ll want to celebrate."
What happens when you let history majors do math
KING: Conservative's support Trump's new white supremacy - NY Daily News
"After multiple divorces he’s now on his third marriage…"
Buckeyes are nuts
Zombie-Themed Nativity Scene Causes a Stir in Ohio - The New York Times
"The couple is asking for donations to improve the structure for next year and to cover any fines they might face."
12.07.2015
When loopier-sounding bowl game names are written…
Area college football teams going bowling - Toledo Blade
"The Wolverines will…face Florida at 1 p.m. on Jan. 1 in the Buffalo Wild Wings Citrus Bowl.…"
Feel the Bern
Sanders voted 'Person of the Year' in Time readers' poll - NY Daily News
"The self-styled Democratic socialist and 2016 presidential candidate came in first in the magazine’s online poll for the award, which closed Sunday night, getting 10.2% support.…
Sanders’ fellow 2016 candidates Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton got only 1.8% and 1.4% support, respectively."
We keep trying but you're not scared enough yet, Bunky
Homeland Secretary: US to roll out new terror alert system
"This will be the third terror alert system put in place by DHS since the September 2001 terrorist attacks."
Say no more
From Katy Perry to Kim Kardashian, How the French Revolution Crept Into Advertising - The Atlantic
"It’s been widely lambasted as one of the most “bizarre” ads in recent history. Kim Kardashian, dressed as Audrey Hepburn…"
12.06.2015
And now a few words from Captain Obvious
Politics - The Washington Post
"San Bernardino massacre underlines a divide among contenders in 2016 race"
Joy to the world
Jerry Falwell Jr.: Let’s teach Muslims ‘a lesson if they ever show up here’ - The Washington Post
"[Liberty University] President Jerry Falwell Jr. urged students to get their permits to carry concealed weapons during the school's convocation.…
"'I’ve always thought that if more good people had concealed-carry permits, then we could end those Muslims before they walked in,' he says, the rest of his sentence drowned out by loud applause while he said, 'and killed them.'"
Buzzword alert
California Attack Has U.S. Rethinking Strategy on Homegrown Terror - The New York Times
"“We used to have a long time from flash to bang because Al Qaeda would spend years planning,” he said."
12.05.2015
"Notorious Brooklyn rabbit hoarder" has got to be the scariest idea ever
Bunny hoarder compares farm sale to ‘terrorist invasion’ | New York Post
"A notorious Brooklyn rabbit hoarder’s entire bunny farm will be up for adoption at $25 a pop during two big events held in Central Park and Union Square next Saturday."
Ain't no place like home
Bro named Bud Weisser breaks into Budweiser Brewery | New York Post
"Weisser was taken into police custody, then issued summonses for trespassing and resisting arrest."
Ooops
Women Will Likely Have to Register for the Draft, Army Secretary Says | Military.com
"Nearly 17 million male U.S. citizens and male immigrant non-citizens between the ages of 18 and 25 currently are registered for conscription with the Selective Service System, an independent government agency."
12.04.2015
Yes, we have no…
Bye, bye, bananas - The Washington Post
"At this point, they say, it's not a question of whether Tropical Race 4 will infiltrate the mothership of global banana production; it's a matter of when."
Or, come to think of it, how about "Fool Control"?
Marco Rubio Wants to Know Why Nobody's Talking About 'Bomb Control'
"It's true, nobody talked about bomb control. That may have something to do with the fact that, because bombs are objects capable of doing extreme damage to large numbers of people quickly, and exist solely for the purpose of maiming or killing things, we have decided to restrict who is allowed to have them. Some would even say we control them."
If you're just wounded it doesn't count, says little Tucker's "Daily Caller"
Why The 355 Mass Shooting Number Just Doesn't Work | The Daily Caller
"While 'mass shooting' conjures images of bloodbaths like San Bernardino, Sandy Hook, or Columbine, 147 of the shootings tracked by Shooting Tracker actually didn’t result in a single death."
Also "gangland massacres” and "grisly murder-suicides” are exempt.
So things aren’t so bad after all. Really.
Corn plasters?
I'm looking for some small, noncommittal, lactose free, gluten free, nut free, and above all cheap gifts to have on hand for the holiday season. But since it seems just about everybody is diabetic these days chocolate, a long-time standby, loses its appeal.
Corn plasters, though, just might work.
Or maybe I should keep trying.
Corn plasters, though, just might work.
Or maybe I should keep trying.
And they've been wrong only twice
Friday Cover: Trump County, USA - POLITICO Magazine
"Terre Haute is the land of Clabber Girl Baking Powder—and its citizens call it the 'Crossroads of America.'"
The cult of guns
Tough Talk and a Cowardly Vote on Terrorism - The New York Times
"While the nation suffered through the shock of another bloody massacre, on Thursday every Senate Republican except Mark Kirk of Illinois voted against legislation to prevent people on the F.B.I.’s consolidated terrorist watchlist from purchasing guns or explosives.…
Another bill that would have expanded background checks to gun show and online firearms sales to screen out convicted felons and the mentally ill also failed on Thursday. The four Republican senators running for president — Ted Cruz, Marco Rubio, Rand Paul and Lindsey Graham — all turned up to vote against these common-sense measures."
12.03.2015
Awww, isn't this kind of cute?
Jeb!: "Should I win this nomination, I will take it to Hillary Clinton and I will whup her"
— Betsy Woodruff (@woodruffbets) December 3, 2015
Maybe, just maybe the reason Jeb!'s campaign won't take off is nobody wants another Bush.It's a flat-out lie
It doesn't open there. It doesn't open anywhere.
The real threats to civilization are package designers.
JIC you're tired of reading about guns today
Man accused of assaulting two other men with lumber during argument over hot dogs gets 3 years in prison: https://t.co/vlkvC6eNfH #odd
— AP Oddities (@AP_Oddities) December 3, 2015
More free than usual this week, Pierce says
San Bernardino Was One of Three Multiple Shooting Events Yesterday in America
"There is an entire school of political thought that believes a rump faction of theocratic barbarians in a distant desert has the will and the capability to not merely cause acts of bloody mayhem, but to bring down Western civilization itself. If you accept this weird apocalyptic vision—and every Republican candidate for president professes to believe it—then it's hard to understand why you would oppose an effort to deny weapons to people already on the government's no-fly list. I mean, this is war—or, rather, 'war'—right?"
12.02.2015
We could pay off the debt if we charged an entertainment tax on this election
Carson falls hard as Trump takes huge lead in national poll | Sun Times National
"'Dr. Ben Carson, moving to center stage just one month ago, now needs some CPR,' Malloy said. 'The Doctor sinks. The Donald soars. The GOP, 11 months from the election, has to be thinking, ‘This could be the guy.’'"
How far ahead of the curve were we, anyway?
The Latest Trend in Millennial Parenting: Cloth Diapers - Vogue
"'Trust me, it’s a thing,' she explained. 'Especially in Brooklyn.'"
That's our Liz
How Elizabeth Warren is winning the Democratic presidential primary season - The Washington Post
“…in staying out of the 2016 spotlight, Warren's presence (and popularity among the Democratic base) are paradoxically looming even larger over the Democratic primary. That arms-length strategy has helped Warren achieve what might not have been possible if she had actually jumped into the race herself: making the Democratic Party's economic platform sound more and more like her own."
Taking a liking to Ted Cruz?
Says Cruz’s freshman college roommate:
“I would rather have anybody else be the president of the United States. Anyone. I would rather pick somebody from the phone book.”
And an alumnus of the Bush 2000 campaign told Frank Bruni of the New York Times:
“Why do people take such an instant dislike to Ted Cruz? It just saves time.”
All this and much more about Cruz in Bruni’s column today…
Anyone but Ted Cruz - The New York Times
""
12.01.2015
Finally…
…it’s time to start getting excited about the iPhone 7.
iPhone 7: what will the handset's new 'smart headphones' do? | The Week UK
Sure, it’s still a year off, but so is the next election and look how long we’ve been obsessing about that.
When in Rome…ban Romans
Rome banishes centurion impersonators ahead of Holy Year | Reuters
"City hall said the Roman soldiers, many of whom hail from the poorer periphery and commute for hours to the historic center, pose risks both to people's safety and the "respectability" of the city's numerous monuments."
W00t! I always wanted to be a badass!
Ted Cruz: Most Violent Criminals Are Democrats - The Daily Beast
"Calling it a "simple and undeniable fact," the Texan senator claimed "the media doesn't report that.""
True, I’m sort of a lapsed Democrat at the moment, but this just might be a reason to un-lapse!
A nuff is a nuff
It’s cold and rainy here. The radar machine says just north is a pocket of that New England staple, “mixed precip.” Here, it’s more like football weather in Green Bay. Whom needs that?
I’ve already been out three times and now I’m staying in. Also, big warm socks.
11.30.2015
Spare us the purple prose, please
"They weren’t just mad about giving up 14 unanswered points in the fourth quarter, which turned a pleasant runaway win into yet another encounter with that old pal Dread, plus his cousin Angst, and their stuffed dead rat Despair."
A cavalcade of losers
Move over, Ben Carson. Nobody cares about your West Point story. Hillary wanted to join the Marines and be an astronaut.
We can’t wait to see who tops that.
The omen
Moving my laundry from the washer to the dryer this morning I found in with my stuff a little plastic disk, about the size of a nickel, that says, "Perfect."
I'm keeping it.
I'm keeping it.
11.29.2015
Loose ends
The Threatened Net: A Washington Post book (Spoiler: It keeps getting worse.)
U.S. vs. Hackers: New York Times (Spoiler: Ditto.)
The government has protected your security and privacy better than you think: Washington Post (Spoiler: Whew.)
And for extra credit:
11.27.2015
It's not insanity, it's hormones
"MSNBC host Joe Scarborough, a former GOP congressman from Florida, tweeted that the push to remove Wilson’s name is 'insanity.'"
At Berkeley, in the mid-60’s, students protested as part of a Free Speech Movement (sounds sort of contrary now, huh?). In ’66 they protested against the draft and in ’67, napalm.
Civil rights protests were a standard feature of student life in the 60’s and 70’s.
At about the same time, in China,students calling themselves the “Red Guard” campaigned against "intellectual elitism" and "bourgeois” tendencies. destroyed “old” books and art, ransacked museums, knocked down statures and demanded re-education of their parents and teachers.
German university students merrily burned offending books in the late 1930’s.
In 1766, Harvard students demonstrated against bad butter ("Behold, our butter stinketh!”) In 1229, students at the University of Paris struck for two years over issues of town and gown (you’ve gotta admire their persistence).
Some of the protests led to good and worthy reforms, some not so much.
Adults in every case were suitably outraged, which is, after all, the point.
Time, as they used to say in those old movie newsreels—some of which undoubtedly documented students protesting—marches on.
So…wait…you're saying…
"The report illustrates the difficulties the government has faced since Sept. 11 in developing a reliable and easy way to detect deadly pathogens, even though the bio-defense research industry has spent billions of dollars on the effort."
Oh. Billions of dollars. I get it now.
Da Bears
Easing the general gloom around here about Chicago football fortunes, da Bears beat the Packers last night in the rain, in Green Bay. Or, perhaps, this is some alternate universe.
Either way, I'm likely to be happy for a week, at least.
Either way, I'm likely to be happy for a week, at least.
11.25.2015
Wait, what?
State Department: Iran Deal Not 'Legally Binding' and Iran Didn't Sign It | National Review Online
"'The Joint Comprehensive Plan of Action (JCPOA) is not a treaty or an executive agreement, and is not a signed document,' wrote Julia Frifield, the State Department assistant secretary for legislative affairs, in the November 19 letter."
Buckeyes are nuts
Ohio woman fined for damaging county office with glitter, 'silly string' - Yahoo News
"At her trial, jurors heard evidence that Lockhart dumped glitter, silly string and unknown powder across the employee’s desk, damaging a computer and other equipment, said James Pollack, spokesman for the Summit County prosecutor’s office. Silly string is a toy where soft plastic is propelled from a tube."
I didn't do it, judge—I was high on meth when I confessed
‘Child-porn-peddling’ dentist blames meth for confession | New York Post
"The Chelsea dentist who allegedly bragged about engaging in bestiality and intentionally spreading HIV to gay lovers by poking holes in condoms claims he lied about it all to an FBI informant because he was high on meth."
Really?
Could have made it an even 70, right?
Gas is low, terrorism fears high at onset of Thanksgiving travel | New York Post
"Airfares have increased just 69 cents on average since last year, according to the Airlines Reporting Corp…"
Are there no Lions any more?
I thought the Lions always played football on Thanksgiving day. But nooooo. Tomorrow it’s the Bears and the Packers.
That’ll be depressing.
I might need extra pie.
Four percent
Chance the Bears will make the playoffs this year. Sounds about right.
The Bengals, however, have a 99 percent chance, and the Seahawks 50. See what could change the odds…
N.F.L. Playoff Simulator - The New York Times
Home sweet Miami
Pumpkin Pie in Miami: Thanksgiving Flight Patterns - The New York Times
"Thanksgiving is known as a time to return home to family, with the holiday calling to mind images of grandmother’s house. But for many Americans, it’s also now a chance to go on vacation."
Looks like the whole city of Boston is moving to Miami for the weekend; likewise DC and, curiously, Atlanta. Well, Atlanta’s a big air hub so maybe that’s why it looks that way.
Some really cool graphics in this story of Thanksgiving travel plans.
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