Granny slang

"Granny slang is the colloquial parlance of the elderly. Its nickname is, itself, slang, which is perhaps why it has taken on a superfluous gendered personification. It's not necessarily effeminate; granddads are just as likely to use granny slang; it denotes age, not gender. Admittedly, 'granny and granddad slang' doesn't have quite the same ring to it."

It's from across the pond, but people get old there too.

Hot, schmot

It's 84° out there. OK, maybe a little hot-ish. But let's get all steamed up about it.


The future is coming for YOU

Study: 1 in 4 U.S. Jobs At Risk of Offshoring | Economy | US News

"Computer programmers, actuaries, statisticians and film and video editors are all among the most at-risk for offshoring, while telemarketers, insurance underwriters, mathematical technicians and library technicians are all at risk of automation."

Automated telemarketers. If that doesn’t make your blood run cold nothing ever will.

The most disturbing revelation from this study, however, is this:

"Since the recession that ended in 2009, researchers estimate 'half the net establishment growth [or business formation] in the United States … occurred in just 0.64 percent of the more than 3,100 U.S. counties.’"

Ghost towns now, and more ghost towns tomorrow. 

Read on.


In the meantime hold it

Duluth City Council places pause on Park Point restrooms | Duluth News Tribune

Or wait…that's a lake isn't it?

Look, guys, everybody makes mistakes

Toledo officials admit error on $8.2M in budget - The Blade

Are the chickens sad?

Cheap chicken parts at the grocery store this morning. Maybe they're from sad 😞 chickens. Happy 🙂 chicken parts would cost more, wouldn't they?

Let’s not even think about it

Lovers quarrel escalates into bloody machete fight | New York Post


This is going in to my museum next to my slide rule

All of these guys need a timeout …

Twitter taunts: Ex-Hillary and Obama aides reveling in the Don Jr. controversy | Fox News

All of them, both sides. The election's over. These guys should be working on how to run the country. 

And if they're not up to it we should dump the lot and get some real first-graders to get it done. 

Reading stuff like this makes me want to just go back to bed

Growing up in the 1990's…

Asian American studies class is now officially a punishment in California

Airbnb host must pay $5,000 in damages for canceling reservation - NY Daily News

Can Calculus be far behind?

The Trump Show keeps getting better and better

Trump Lawyer Marc Kasowitz Threatens Stranger in Emails: 'Watch Your Back , Bitch' - ProPublica

Maybe it's a movie and we're just stuck watching it. I'm beginning to feel a need for popcorn.


So maybe the real problem is the Russians just didn't pay enough

Which foreign countries spent the most to influence U.S. politics? - The Washington Post


It’s a completely perfect summer day …

…for doing absolutely nothing: Hot, humid, a little dark and rainy, thundery (bit not too much). Lucky I've got a good book. And Mozart.

One big butterfly

This’ll show ‘em

Joe Scarborough announces he's leaving the Republican Party - NY Daily News

Is this the dumbest advice ever?

Store in a Cool Dry Place

Are you kidding? There is no cool dry place here and there won't be until at least December. So here's a shout-out to the guys at the Edinburgh Tea and Coffee Company:

Fat Chance

It’s been a busy week so far here at Yet Another Media Empire…

…more work than usual to avoid…which is probably why our ever-harried newsroom missed this communique from our Seattle Desk when it arrived a couple of days ago, herewith in toto…

At first I thought Trump wanted to be the first US dictator. He has the bravado and greed involved, but he's not smart enough. Doesn't know enough about how dictators work. Then I thought he wanted to institute a US oligarchy. That might work. He's probably good at passing out goodies and getting rich on the kickbacks. But, that's not it either.  

What we've done is given up the White House to a crime family. Think about it. The leader of the group is . . . wait for it . . . The Don. Now that Donald. Jr. has found his ass in the grinder, he has lawyered up. He hired Alan Futerfas. As the Huffington Post put it, "Later Monday, Trump Jr. announced he had hired Alan Futerfas as his lawyer. Futerfas is known for representing the GambinoGenovese and Colombo crime families." 

It's all just too perfect.

Sam Guy


They’re not lost, they’re on the subway

Umbrella-sharing startup loses nearly all of its 300,000 umbrellas in a matter of weeks: Shanghaiist

Each lost umbrella costs the company 60 yuan to replace, but Zhao has not yet given up hope. He reportedly plans to release another 30 million umbrellas by the end of the year. If at first you don't succeed...


Mad dogs and Englishmen…

…go out in the noonday sun. But here's some shade.

The latest in white-guy graffiti

First, what is an underwater pool?

And second, you're kidding me here, right?

Amazon patents bizarre plan to store product in giant underwater pools | New York Post

It’s come to this

Chuck Schumer calls for crackdown on 'snortable chocolate' | New York Post

"I can't think of a single parent who thinks it is a good idea for their children to be snorting over-the-counter stimulants up their noses," Schumer blasted. 


Why not just sell Kryptonite and be done with it?

We are shocked

Donald Trump likes ketchup on his steak.

Mother Jones His love for well-done steak and iceberg lettuce says a lot about his politics. Jenny Luna Jun. 30, 2017 6:00 AM. 

That does it. 


This just doesn’t seem fair

Man jumps out of eight-story window to avoid parole officer | New York Post


Sure I believe this! Of course I do!

Alarm Clock Retrieved After Being Stuck In Wall For 13 Years « CBS Pittsburgh

"It all began when Jerry Lynn lowered a TV wire down to the living room. In order to know the location of the wire in the wall, he attached an alarm clock to it."


Meanwhile, in other culinary news…

Joey Chestnut wins 10th title, gobbles a record 72 hot dogs | Sports | azdailysun.com

"Chestnut has dominated the chowdown throwdown for years, eating 70 franks and buns last year to top his then-record and take back the title from Matt "The Megatoad" Stonie. The 25-year-old Stonie came in third on Tuesday, with 48 franks and buns."

We're declaring this Spam Week since we missed Spam Day, which was yesterday

Luckily Sam Guy in Seattle noticed this or we might have had to wait another decade to celebrate anything at all.

At 80 Years Old, Spam Has Spawned a Culinary Legacy - NBC News

“In Hawaii, Spam — it’s literally all around you,” Ravi Kapur, chef at the James Beard Award-nominated restaurant Liholiho Yacht Club in San Francisco, told NBC News. “When Spam was on sale, there’d be a limit — limit 10 per person. "

Which reminds me, I’m down to one. Better put it on the list.


That holiday weekend was too long

But it's over now and I can finally get back to not working.

So it worked then

Man tries to kill wasps but sets off fireworks and destroys garage instead - CNN.com

Luckily, no one was injured. Except, we assume, the wasps.


No parade was rained on here today

We are in the midst of a serious parade shortage where I live, but there was no rain anyway.

It was the Memorial Day parade that got rained out this year. We had a Pride parade a couple of weeks ago but apparently the organizers never applied for a permit to walk in the street so the parade was really was really just a little more traffic than usual on the sidewalk. And it had no band. What is the point of a parade with out a band? It doesn't have to be a good band, it just has to have a little tune and some drums.

The Independence Day parade isn't anymore. I don't know exactly why, but probably it has to do with a lack of bands as well, people being on vacation and all. We do still have fireworks, and also hot dogs and potato salad, so all is not lost. But still, no parade.

Which leaves us with the County Fair parade in the autumn. It's the same parade every year, but every year there are different slogans on the floats. It's always kind of fun, but never surprising. 

Kind of like living here, now that you mention it.


Who knew this?

I didn't, for one. Saw this sign in the AP newsfeed and noticed the word Juliet was spelled with two t's. As in, well, Juliett. How can that be right?

I checked with Romeo. Yup, only one t. Juliet.

But it turns out that in the official NATO phonetic alphabet the word Juliett, which stands for the letter J, is spelled with two t's. Juliett. You can see for yourself: http://bit.ly/2uCZfAF

So now I know. Wherefore art thou?


You thought they just had cheese in Wisconsin, but no

Escaped elephant strolls through Wisconsin neighborhood | KOMO

HEADLINE: Mayor wears wrong shorts

No kidding.

We need an app for this

Kids better at using technology than tying their shoes: study | New York Post

Finally there's some good news

NASA clarifies: We don't have child sex slaves on Mars | New York Post

"There are no humans on Mars. There are active rovers on Mars. There was a rumor going around last week that there weren't. There are," Guy Webster, a spokesperson for NASA's Mars exploration, was forced to tell The Daily Beast. "But there are no humans."


Hope is not dead

Man with Monopoly 'Get out of jail free' card can't avoid arrest - NY Daily News

Only in New York

SEE IT: Snake wraps itself around pole on L train - NY Daily News

While nearly everyone on the train seemed unfazed by the zoo-like atmosphere, one man can be heard saying, "Snakes on a train, yo, snakes on a train."


We used to call these sunshowers (maybe we still do)

A perfect little summer rain for about three minutes. Just enough to water the grass, wash the street, and rinse the air.

Oh, the humanity

Canada is running out of weed | New York Post


Follow the money

From Reuters News:

Under pressure, Western tech firms bow to Russian demands to share cyber secrets

Western technology companies, including Cisco , IBM and SAP , are acceding to demands by Moscow for access to closely guarded product security secrets, at a time when Russia has been accused of a growing number of cyber attacks on the West, a Reuters investigation has found.


Well then, let's ask if Obama colluded

Obama's secret struggle to retaliate against Putin's election interference - Washington Post

What do you want to bet this story is coming out now because somebody decided it would be better to make it public before the special prosecutor finds out for himself?

Don't go anywhere without your cow

Stuffed toy saves boy in second-storyfall in Chelsea | Boston Herald

Not exactly George Washington Slept Here, but these are smaller times

Donald Trump's ancestral brothel gets a new lease on life - Macleans.ca

The current U.S. president may own resorts on four continents, but his ancestral fortune began with a two-storey outfit selling swan meat and sex in Canada.


If you're hot to fly in Phoenix you might have to cool it today

It's Too Hot For Some Planes To Fly In Phoenix : The Two-Way : NPR

Skip it

Jump Rope Heroes: Watch School Kids Set A One-Minute Guinness World Record : The Two-Way : NPR

Noted by Some Guy


And you think they're not after you

Bizarre, Glowing Sea Creatures Bloom in the Pacific

Shaul says one fisherman put a few in a bucket—and eventually threw them overboard. Only later did he notice that the bucket was glowing.

I doubt this has happened to me before

I had a dream this morning and there was a woman in it. She was a lush strawberry blonde and wore an emerald green dress that matched her eyes. Her eyes seemed to know everything.

We sat alone in the back of a car and snuggled like a couple of kids. Both of us were younger then we had any right to be. There was a kiss, but I won't say who did it.

When I woke there was a cool breeze and the sky was clear and blue.

I hope I see her again.

We made a date for Wednesday.


This is all together out of control

So Many Ways to Describe a Kiss | Merriam-Webster




Is this another Mr. Mueller or the same one?

SCOTUS rules in post-9/11 immigration case - CNNPolitics.com

Supreme Court rules Ashcroft, Mueller cannot be held accountable for post-9/11 immigration detainee claims

I'm just asking…

Who would go to the trouble of hand-raising chickens and then chop them into pieces and shrink wrap them? Somebody, because there were chickens like that at the grocery store this morning. I couldn't bring myself to buy one.

But there was also a really good sale on ground beef and nobody ever hand-raised a hamburger.


This wriggling worm-bot could be used for colonoscopies one day - The Verge

Don't say you weren't warned.

And the Russians are stepping up to help (who says they're not our friends?)

This morning from Bloomberg it's…

Party Time for the Weapons Industry (https://bloom.bg/2sHsncs)


Russia threatens to treat U.S. coalition aircraft as targets over Syria (http://wapo.st/2sHxKbi)

Convenient is that?


On your next trip through Chicago…

Wicker Park Secret Agent Supply Co. – Chicago, Illinois - Atlas Obscura

Must have been some big bird

Why All of Upstate New York Grew Up Eating the Same Barbecue Chicken - Atlas Obscura

Stepping right along

Are 'steps' and 'stairs' the same thing? | Merriam-Webster



I read somewhere…

… it's a sin to eat catsup on hot dogs. I do it anyway.

But I like them with mustard too; also with kraut, chili, or cheese. A Chicago-style dog is not my first choice but I'll eat one if it's right in front of me.


So now when we talk about spam in our email we might mean real Spam?*

Amazon to buy Whole Foods for $13.7 billion - CNET

* The officially correct spelling of Spam is SPAM. 

Steganographic snow and other secret stuff

Here is a nifty piece from the BBC about modern-day steganography  (the art or practice of concealing a messageimage, or file within another messageimage, or file) that gives new meaning to the notion of reading between the lines.

BBC - Future - Why printers add secret tracking dots

Secret recordings are the thing this year

Alex Jones says he secretly recorded Megyn Kelly interview, posts preview online | Page Six


I read this somewhere else and thought it must be a joke…

…but here it is again, this time from Politico.

Putin offers James Comey asylum - POLITICO

That's priceless. We should all have as much fun as Putin seems to be having; the world would be a much jollier place.

Eclipse Megamovie

Here's an interesting plan to photograph a solar eclipse happening on August 21 this year. If you're into this kind of stuff, have a look.



Last night in a paroxysm of insomnia I signed up for Uber…

…and I can confidently report there is no Uber within 20 miles of me in any direction. If I want to take a Uber somewhere I will have to take a bus to where Uber is.

Taking a bus is a problem in itself. For example, the nearest city bus stop to my house is right in front of the grocery store I use, so to take a bus to the grocery store I have to walk to a bus stop farther away and take the bus from there. You can see.

I could take a bus to Boston—I'm pretty sure they have Ubers in  Boston—but they also have one the best public transportation systems in the country (and one of the first) in Boston so what would be the point of that?

I hope I sleep better tonight. 


A judge in Montana may have just solved all our problems

Congressman sentenced to do community service

Nobody could just make that up.

Here is hands-down the dopiest thing I've read all week (I know it's only Tuesday)

COVFEFE Act would make Trump's tweets official records | New York Post

"If the president is going to take to social media to make sudden public policy proclamations, we must ensure that these statements are documented and preserved for future reference," Quigley, a member of the House intelligence committee, said in a statement.

Has this guy never heard of the Internet?

We don't need to preserve Trump's tweets – they will haunt us for all eternity. The internet never forgets anything.

"Tweets are powerful, and the president must be held accountable for every post."

There you go, Quigley old boy. Making progress. Slowly. 

Here's the title Quigley picked for his act in order to make the acronym work out COVFEFE: it's the "Communications Over Various Feeds Electronically For Engagement" Act. 

And yes, it was "intelligence" committee.

Will getting softer like cheese be the next big thing?

Trump is Trump, and will always be - NY Daily News

The odd behavior of many Republicans — the stated belief that Trump, like cheese, will get softer with time…

So it's vittles after all

Victuals - Words Commonly Mispronounced | Merriam-Webster

English is difficult to spell. Like this word. What a relief.

I've imagined this about English speakers: People of my age know how to spell words they aren't quite sure how to pronounce; a lot of younger folks know how to pronounce words they aren't quite sure how to spell. I fancy this is because a lot of us geezers learned new words by reading them, while a lot of younger people learn new words by hearing them. That makes sense somehow, doesn't it?

Well, anyway, here's a little help on some of it.

Another day in the modern world

Pakistan, in a First, Sentences Man to Death Over Blasphemy on Social Media - The New York Times

"The forensic report of his mobile phone showed that he had committed blasphemy in at least 3,000 posts," Mr. Qureshi said.




…who lived around the year 100 CE, give or take, had this to say about economics and society:

"An imbalance between rich and poor in the oldest and most fatal ailment of all republics"*

So it's not like we were't warned.

*Cited in the book The Second Machine Age,  by Erik Brynjolfsson and Andrew McAffe.

Here's something I bet you didn't know

Chicago Tribune

Everyday, 10 people die from unintentional drowning, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. 

Makes you wonder about intentional drowning, doesn't it?


The inmates are running the asylum (boy oh boy)

The Comey hearing was Washington's great fashion show of 2017 — and Comey dressed like its star - The Washington Post

Boy oh boy, did the folks on Capitol Hill look spit-shined and polished for the question-and-maybe-answer session with Comey, carried live on every major network.


Compton's Law of Hydraulic Equilibrium

When you're trying to keep water in, it goes out, but when you're trying to keep it out it comes in.

The basement is always wet when it rains. Today, it's raining a lot. It's been raining a lot for the last week or so.

See above.


Hold on…wait a minute…does anybody ever read these headlines?

Trump Twitter bots, numbering in millions, could be used for evil - NY Daily News

"The millions of Twitter bots that President Trump counts as followers could eventually be "weaponized" to spread fake and misleading news stories …"

False info on the internet? We are shocked! Shocked, I tell you!

The press…the media…whatever it is we call it these days…should really put their collective faces in a paper bag and b r e a t h e. 


Merriam-Webster coincidentally choses "Abdicate" as word of the day

Abdicate | Definition of Abdicate by Merriam-Webster

Or is there a little covfefe here?

Airport gets buggy but Big Apple survives

Apocalyptic swarm of mosquitoes hits La Guardia | New York Post

"Mosquitoes are not a bigger problem across the city this year, however, said Julien Martinez, spokesman for the city Health Department."

If instead of "climate change" you talked about "chocolate shortage" you'd get some action

The End of Cheap Chocolate? Cocoa Futures Surge Most on Record - Bloomberg

"Some growing regions in Ivory Coast and Ghana, the second-largest producer, have been dry and need moisture to aid early crop growth, according to Gaithersburg, Maryland-based MDA Weather Services. Trees are also stressed from a lack of moisture in Indonesia’s Sulawesi region."

For that person who has everything…

Mexican businessman launches 'Trump' toilet paper after insults - NY Daily News



Just one more reason I believe there's no such place as Iowa

Kumail Nanjiani Tells Grads To 'Have Sex With An Immigrant'

Immigrants may feel a little tense about what's happening in American these days, but comedian Kumail Nanjiani has a plan to make things feel a little more relaxing for everyone. ...

"Have sex with an immigrant," Nanjiani told the graduates of Grinnell College in Iowa during a commencement speech. "We're going through a tough time right now, and it would just be really great for morale."

  Read the full story

Shared from Apple News


Mmmm gimme doughnut

 'Unbearable:' Bear seeking doughnuts tears off car bumper

STEAMBOAT SPRINGS, Colo. (AP) _ A bear with a sweet tooth ripped off the bumper of a car used to deliver doughnuts in Colorado then tried to claw its way through the trunk to get inside.

All right. That's it.

Trump EPA plan endangers a global gem — our Great Lakes | Chicago Sun-Times

"Slashing funding for the sensible Great Lakes Restoration Initiative from $300 million annually to $0. Potentially closing the U.S. Enviromental Protection Agency’s Region 5 office in Chicago, which includes the Great Lakes National Program Office, and transferring its staff to Kansas. Rolling back Clean Water Act standards that protect safe, clean drinking water.

What are they thinking?"


Much of what we now call "infrastructure" was, once upon a long time ago, called "public works"

Lessons to be learned from privatization of parking meters | Chicago Sun-Times

"The Washington Post reported Tuesday that the Trump administration is 'drafting plans to privatize some public assets such as airports, bridges, highway rest stops and other facilities.'"

And I’m opposed to selling it off. It’s like eating your seed corn or something. (I’m not a farmer. I’m just pretending I know what that means. But I think it means it’s stupid, which happens to be exactly what I mean, so it works. It’s dumb.)

Plus, I can’t see how selling a rest stop on the Interstate makes much difference to the national state of affairs. But maybe a nice bauble for the occasional campaign contributor…

Here's some nasty news to start your final weekend

Republicans want to let robocallers spam your voicemail - The Washington Post

The Republican National Committee is backing a petition that would allow political campaigns and businesses to leave automated messages on your voicemail, without your phone having to ring. 

MUCH LATER: I don't know what I had in mind when I wrote "final" at the head of this pos, but whatever it was, it was not meant to be prophetic. Relax.


Not exactly a glowing review

New Amazon bookstore looks like airport desperation pit-stop | New York Post

Those New Yorkers—hard to please.

Whar's the matter with kids today?

Methanol detected for first time around young star

(Why can’t they be like we were, perfect in every way?)

First, no

The all-new Things. Your to-do list for Mac & iOS

I do not need a personal task manager. I do not need any sort of task manager at all because I do not do tasks, at least not the kind that need managing in any way. 

Although if you ever come up with anti-task software let me know and I will put it on my Things to Think About Maybe Someday list.

A rose by any other name would be…

…well, a rose, probably. But “George” would rhyme with “charge,” and other delightful things.

How Shakespeare spoke: Original Pronunciation, rhymes, and puns | OxfordWords blog""


Thanks! I was wondering about that

Why Trump women wore veils but not headscarves on foreign trip - NY Daily News

"The Vatican has a strict rule about how women must dress in the presence of the Pope. Saudi Arabia, meanwhile, enforced no such rule on the Trumps, even though women who live in the conservative Muslim kingdom are expected to be covered in public."

It’s hard to stay on top of this stuff. Me, I never even understood hair. Why is hair political. Why, in fact, is hair. I say, off with it.

Not that I could say much else.

Helen Gone of our travel department agrees…

…if the Toledo bus station is the last place on earth, don't go there. You will be better off just…not.

I know this because I spent a week there last Sunday night.

In the course of a round-trip to Ohio by Greyhound, I became intimately acquainted with three bus stations, in fact: New York's Port Authority building at 42nd and 8th (dingy but tolerable, and moderately entertaining); the bus station in Cleveland (you wouldn't want to be there twice but yet I was); and Toledo (The Pit).

The agent at Toledo mumbled under his breath, "why do they keep sending people here?"

I have the feeling I was lucky to have got out at all.

Also, a shout-out to Greyhound for installing new seats that are even more uncomfortable than the old ones. And they said it could't be done.

I am off for Vermont in the morning, but only for a few hours. So how bad can that be?


When these guys say royal service they're not kidding

Royal treatment: Dutch King reveals he piloted KLM passenger flights - CNN.con

There's a place for everything

Cops: Man drives drunk in state police academy's parking lot


Is it just me or is there something weird here?

Police: Drunken driving suspect had lizard in bra

Still, not something you would take to the beach

Watch the British Library Digitize One of the World's Largest Books

"Obviously the atlas is rather a tricky thing to read — though it has wheels fixed onto it to make it easier to move around"


This is really a sad story…

The World: ship is 'most exclusive floating city' - CNN.com

Home to the world's only full-sized at-sea tennis court, a 7,000-square foot spa and fitness center, and 12,000-bottle wine collection, this ship has visited 1,213 ports and sailed 641,000 nautical miles.

…but somehow the idea of playing tennis on a ship at sea cracks me up.  Me, I can't even play it on flat, unmoving dry land.

Shedding a tear with the clown

AP Exclusive: The last days of the Ringling Bros. circus


The "gritty past" this story talks about is 1981

Street art photographer Martha Cooper immortalizes New York City's gritty past

Also there seems to be only one picture in the story, but maybe that’s just because I’m not counting right.

Unexpected? Not to anyone who's ever been to high school

Facebook promised to tackle fake news. But the evidence shows it's not working | Technology | The Guardian

“When Facebook’s new fact-checking system labeled a Newport Buzz article as possible 'fake news', warning users against sharing it, something unexpected happened. Traffic to the story skyrocketed, according to Christian Winthrop, editor of the local Rhode Island website."

Eww, I was reduced to eating veggies for breakfast

Peas and carrots. Ugly, right? Sure, I eat peanut butter for breakfast but that's where I draw the line.

My grocery schedule needs to be revised.

Profiles in CYA

Trump's intelligence slip-up may be the straw that breaks the camel's back


President Donald Trump shared highly classified information with Russian foreign minister Sergey Lavrov and Russian ambassador Sergey Kislyak during a meeting in the Oval Office last week, according to reporting by the Washington Post. 

"I think those same members of Congress will begin to speak out," said one senior Republican House member granted anonymity to speak candidly.

Read the full story

Shared from Apple News


No kidding

If Americans Can Find North Korea on a Map, They're More Likely to Prefer Diplomacy - The New York Times

Americans' geography skills remain poor

Can't get started without you…

…or at least a nice piece of leftover chocolate cake. It's anther chilly, damp morning in the Commonwealth. Maybe another cup of coffee too.


So they had an un-free speech rally?

Boston Common ‘Free Speech Rally’ sparks counter-protest | Boston Herald

"The man holding the Pepsi could be seen throwing at least one punch with the can of soda still in his hand."

Oh. Just another internet joke.

And make it something nice

Every Day, Your Mom Wasted 90 Minutes of Her Life On You, So Get Her a Present | FiveThirtyEight


Crashes and burns

Don't call me Caitlyn: Baby name plunges in popularity

"In fact, the four names that dropped the most were all variations of the same name: Caitlin, Caitlyn, Katelynn and Kaitlynn."

Take that, Mom

Mouse running low?

Install those updates, and do it right away

The Ransomware Meltdown Experts Warned About Is Here

It's not just British hospitals. A nasty strain of ransomware is sweeping the world. Read the full story

Shared from Apple News

All you need to know about seasteading

The Seasteading Institute – Opening humanity's next frontier

"I fell in love immediately." Talking to the incomparable David Frizzell, Leadership Consultant and host of the Team Guru Podcast, reminded me of how I felt when I first grokked

On presidents not inventing words

How to Sound Presidential | Merriam-Webster


One of the most droll (and certainly the most civilized) thing you can do on Twitter…

…is follow Merriam-Webster Dictionary.

Dictionary tweets trending in this American political life - Chicago Tribune


Spectacularly Cassini

See stunning photos of Saturn taken by the Cassini spacecraft - The Washington Post

A modest Modest Proposal

One Republican’s plan to save money: Turn 82,000 non-English-speaking kids over to ICE - The Washington Post

Where is Johnathan Swift when we need him?


Refreshingly disgusting, this day is turning out to be

Mom finds gross ‘squid-like’ horror in her coconut water | New York Post

“I still can’t believe this I’m so disgusted it’s the only water I ever drink I will never in my life drink it again … It looks like a freaking octopus just looking at it makes me sick,” Kline wrote in a Facebook post along with photos of her horrifying discovery.

History meets Orwell, and agrees

News release: Workers prepare to remove Jefferson Davis statue in New Orleans, 2nd Confederate monument to be removed

NEW ORLEANS (AP) — News release: Workers prepare to remove Jefferson Davis statue in New Orleans, 2nd Confederate monument...

Read the full story

A toad in your shoe? A toad?

Let's hope this is the most dispiriting thing you hear all day.

Australia warns travelers to not bring in hitchhiking toads

CANBERRA, Australia (AP) — Australian quarantine authorities on Thursday urged travelers through Asia to avoid…

The black-spined toad found by a biosecurity officer inside the shoe had only recently died and was probably alive when the passenger put the shoe on in Indonesia, O'Connor said in a statement.

Read the full story

Sent from AP News. Download now on the App Store or Google Play


Me, I think it's wonderful

‘The Daily’: Which Investigation Got James Comey Fired? - The New York Times

Did he or didn’t he? Will he or won’t he? And what about her? I’m thinking Hillary is right this very moment busily re-writing her much anticipated(and much already paid for) book.

It’s glorious.

I really don’t care how it turns out. I’m just enjoying the show. This year has bee  pretty dreadful so far but I think it’s about to turn around.

And, Giuliani for AG? Christie?


OK that's a little ambiguous, but still

Tunnel with nuclear waste collapses in Washington state - Western Mass News - WGGB/WSHM

In the past, rail cars full of radioactive waste were driven into the tunnels and then buried there, he said.

OMG we're all gonna freeze!

Scientists Found An 'Unexpected' Source Of Climate Cooling | The Daily Caller

"“These findings challenge the widely held perception that areas characterized by shallow-water methane seeps and/or strongly elevated sea−air methane flux always increase the global atmospheric greenhouse gas burden,” reads the study’s executive summary."

Or get bored to death.

(FYI, this is from that little Tucker’s former web site.)

So I'm just thinking here…

Jesse Jackson Jr. surfaces in Chinese billionaire's criminal case | Chicago Sun-Times

…after we’re done with the Russians why don’t we open an investigation of all the foreign influence in U.S. politics? Imagine what would crawl out from under that rock.


SPOILER: The Russians did it

Bill Clinton and James Patterson collaborating on new political thriller

The Washington Post

'The President Is Missing' will be published in June 2018. 

Read the full story

If you really just can't wait to go through it again…

The 7 Signs That Someone Might Be Running For President In 2020


Donald Trump showed that the field of people who could be elected president is larger than just senators, governors and vice presidents. And his underwhelming approval ratings so far suggest that anyone who wants to be the commander-in-chief should run in 2020 — at the moment, President Trump looks vulnerable. 

Read the full story

Soon to be another great reason for not watching TV

Clinton campaign tell-all may become TV series | New York Post

"Shattered: Inside Hillary Clinton's Doomed Campaign,"the best-selling book written by Jonathan Allen and Amie Parnes, has been optioned by TriStar Television and Davis Entertainment as a limited television series, according to the New York Times.


Gibralter may crumble

Brexit holds the cards to Gibraltar's gambling future

"Britain’s looming departure from the EU, therefore, has cast a cloud over Gibraltar’s future because Brexit could see it shut off from the rest of the EU. That possibility is already having an indirect impact on Gibraltar, by magnifying the appeal of other low-tax jurisdictions such as Malta."


What, you wanted a roof too?

Billions of dollars of steel, glass and metal were no match for Mother Nature on Friday afternoon, when rain poured through the roof at the Oculus train station like a "shower overhead," sending drenched commuters slipping and sliding for the door.

Nice picture there, Daily News

Democrats aghast over DHS chief John Kelly's deportation tactics - NY Daily News



The hot new trend in food is literal garbage

The Washington Post

"Ugly-fruit jam and state-bread beer are big business…

"According to the Environmental Protection Agency, Americans threw away 38 million tons of food in 2014 alone — much of it unbought, unmarketable or unharvested food that was still perfectly edible."

 Read the full story


And that's not all

Scientists and chefs agree: It's time to start eating bugs | New York Post

"Looking to whip up a unique cocktail? Adding ants to a gin and tonic adds a citrus-y kick to your drink."

And it's not covered by Trumpcare

What is Exploding Head Syndrome and how to tell if you have it - NY Daily News

"Some people have claimed that the origin of the disorder comes from government officials pointing directed energy weapons at them…"

Karma is a bitch

Russia says US coalition banned from Syria "de-escalation zones" under no-fly deal with Iran and Turkey - CBS News


In Chicago, pigs will fly

"Flying Pigs" installation will block Trump sign in Chicago - Archpaper.com

The helium-filled balloons will then be floated, single file, from a construction barge in the Chicago River at just such a height to obscure the 20-foot-by-141-foot Trump sign. The single day installation is expected to be launched in late August or early September.



We need to organize a bake sale to buy the State Department a printer

Huma Abedin had Anthony Weiner print classified emails for Hillary Clinton, James Comey says.


Just when I thought there was nothing more to worry about

The 'new page' tab in Chrome is not symmetrical... and now I hate Google

"Once you see it, you can never unsee it.…"

But believe us, it has nothing to do with the amount of money that's pouring in

Why Do Americans Smile So Much?

The Atlantic

How immigration and cultural values affect what people do with their faces 

"For a study published last year, researchers compared the official photos of American and Chinese business and government leaders. After coding them according to their levels of "facial muscle movement," they found that American leaders in all contexts were both more likely to smile and showed more "excited" smiles than the Chinese leaders did."

Read the full story


It seems we might have saved a little ink here

I applied for a re-up of my state ID this morning and got a printed temporary Identification Card on which is printed, in big bold letters…

This card was issued by the Commonwealth of Massachusetts solely for the purpose of establishing identification of the bearer.

followed by…


And a lifetime award for work avoidance goes to…

Nobody knows cartoons like the New Yorker's Bob Mankoff. Were mine good enough for him? - The Washington Post

"This is almost like work," he faux-whined in a nasal New York-ese as the cartoonists paraded through, their submissions among the 500 he reviews in a week. "I've dedicated my life to avoiding work. This is like the Motor Vehicles Bureau."


Trump is missing a big wall-building opportunity here

How liquor shops are getting around India's latest booze ban

The Economist

IT WAS the classic shot-chaser combination. First India's Supreme Court upheld a recent decision barring retail sales of alcohol within 500m of a state or national highway. Then it extended the ruling to hotels, restaurants, bars and pubs. 

One bar has constructed a maze with pre-fabricated concrete walls that artificially increase the distance from its front door to the highway to just a little over 500m. The zigzag warren leading up to the watering hole has been nicknamed the "Wall of Love" and cost some 200,000 rupees ($3,000) to build. 

Read the full story

For serious math geeks

Why Spider-Man Should Just Take the Subway | FiveThirtyEight

And by the way, it's National Superhero Day.

And you thought all that stuff would never come in handy

NYPD: Woman shot at point-blank range saved by her purse

New diet plan revealed; called "Going to Yale"

Yale Grad Students Go on 'Symbolic' Hunger Strike Where They're Allowed to Eat

…"protesters can leave and get food when they can no longer go on."

Also, for the record…

"Yale doctoral students currently earn a stipend $30,000 a year, receive free health care, and have their $40,000 tuition paid in full, according to Yale News."


Maybe Dems could teach the Russians a thing or two

"Shattered" Reveals Clinton and Sanders Staffs Struck Deal to Hide Protests

Shared via the Google app


Activism takes a new turn

New Manhattan cocktail bar provides anti-Trump safe haven

Choosing to drink at Coup “makes you feel like you’re doing something,” attorney Matthew Hayes told the AP. “Instead of just getting sotted, you can also throw something to a good cause.”


Can't wait to see the movie

Dozens of snakes dumped in Arkansas Walmart parking lot
Fox News

Arkansas police received calls from frightened customers who encountered the dozens of snakes that were dumped in the parking lot of a local Walmart. Read the full story

You did it this time, United

United probing in-flight death of prized rabbit | New York Post

Edwards previously told The Sun that Simon had a check-up with the vet three hours before the flight and "was fit as a fiddle."


As well he should

Man in bunny suit who blew air horn at police pleads guilty

Read the full story

Sent from AP News. Download now on the App Store or Google Play

Got a little sand in your eye? Maybe you can sell it to China!

The Economist explains: Why there is a shortage of sand | The Economist

"No surprise…that Asia is the biggest consumer of sand. China alone accounts for half of the world's demand."

Steampunk rules

Space May Be Next Frontier for Earth's Crude Oil Giants: Analyst - Bloomberg


"Water can be used as a propellant in space or split into hydrogen and oxygen, and then recombined and combusted. Deep Space Industries Inc., an asteroid mining company, has developed a thruster that heats water into a steam propellant, according to Goldman."

Read the full story


Facebook declines to give us free brain implants

Facebook Is Pioneering Technology That Allows Users to Type Using Just Their Thoughts

 Read the full story

BUT says "We're working on a system that will let you type straight from your brain about 5x faster than you can type on your phone today."

We say, this is one of the most terrifying ideas we've heard in a long, long time.


Why am I guessing they also sell beer?

Chocolate Chip Mint: Better get used to it . . .


It was a very good year

20-year-old McDonald's sauce packet sells for nearly $15K | New York Post

"I just bought a really old car, while cleaning it I found a packet of this sauce," reads the auction author's description. 

Science discovers peer pressure

Social media causes runners to exercise even more - NY Daily News

Researchers have discovered that people's fitness routines are heavily dependent on how they feel about other people's fitness routines.

Pretty soon we'll know everything.


Phooey. Now I want one

The Starbucks Unicorn Frappuccino Represents Everything That Is Wrong With America


Pot and kettle really going at it now

Did Sarah Palin, Ted Nugent and Kid Rock go too far in mocking Hillary Clinton's portrait?

The Washington Post

Paul Begala, a former White House counselor to President Bill Clinton, called the impromptu photo "a white trash Mount Rushmore." 

Read the full story

How long before SNL satirizes itself?

That's a thought!

Berkeley reverses decision to cancel speech by conservative pundit Ann Coulter - The Washington Post

"What are they going to do? Arrest me?"

Meanwhile Berkeley, once the home of the free speech movement, is now apparently the home of the safe speech movement. How far we have fallen.

Banks need more love… and more of your money would be nice too, you cheapskates

From Reuters News:

Trump to order U.S. Treasury to delve into taxes, post-crisis reforms

U.S. President Donald Trump will order the Treasury on Friday to find and reduce tax burdens and review post-financial crisis reforms that banks and insurance companies have said hinder their ability to do business.