12.20.2014

Headquarters-tested and approved

Chocolate Chip Cricket Cookies — Six Foods

And a good time was had by all.

Remember the Alamo, Remember the Maine, and now…

…Remember The Interview? Really?

Commentary: Sony's fear and 'The Interview' decision set terrible precedent - San Jose Mercury News

"'They will not have just won this battle, but they will be emboldened to continue the war, from hacking to intimidating us, to more violent means,' said Carole Lieberman, a psychiatrist and author of 'Coping with Terrorism: Dreams Interrupted.' 'We are now being seen as a cowering nation and terrorists from Korea to the Middle East are laughing at us.'"

Give us a break. How is Sony Pictures “us”?

(In fact. from Wikipedia…

Sony Pictures Entertainment Inc. (SPE) is the American entertainment subsidiary of Japanese multinational technology and media conglomerate Sony.

Just pointing out.)

And now we’re supposed to do what, go to war over some freaking movie company? Because otherwise the terrorists will win?

Get a grip.

Modern conveniences

Politician ‘follows’ porn star, says Twitter account was hacked | New York Post

"County Executive Steve Bellone said that is how the 19-year-old Duke University student and porn actress ended up as one of the 267 people on his ‘following’ list."

Now we can just blame Kim Jong Un for everything.

12.19.2014

"Heir to the P.T. Barnum ideological fortune"

Noted by our Pacific Rim Bureau chief, from the Seattle Times:

Over-the-top enhancement plan is ripe for roasting | Ron Judd

"Clearly determined to make himself more synonymous with ‘roasting’ than a tipsy Dean Martin, established non-Seattleite Howard Schultz…the somewhat-ingenious peddler of the $5 coffee drink, announced a new plan to (literally) double the bucks in Starbucks with a new line of ‘Reserve’ beans and ‘Roasteries’ with all sorts of imaginary special qualities."

Headquartered as we are in a town with not just fewer than 42 but zero Starbucks outlets, we can only wonder at the magnificence of it all. Imagine:

“The half-again-more-costly magical brew will be roasted in Extraordinarily Special Supercalifragilistic machinery, then dispensed via copper pneumatic tubing…"

That ain’t just Joe.

Almost as bad as trying to hold up a donut store

Kentucky woman arrested for shoplifting at a 'Shop with a Cop' event

"A Kentucky woman was in jail on Wednesday after authorities caught her trying to shoplift merchandise while her son took part in a 'Shop with a Cop' event."

Is this the stupidest headline ever written?

US not fully prepared for nuclear terrorist attack

"'This report makes clear that there are some areas of our country's preparedness that need strengthening up,' said Sen. Bob Casey, D-Pa., who co-chairs the Senate Caucus on Weapons of Mass Destruction Terrorism."

I think we’ve found it!

Also, who knew there was a Senate Caucus on Weapons of Mass Destruction Terrorism? Does this mean there’s also a Senate caucus on not weapons of mass destruction terrorism? 

12.18.2014

Shut up and eat your ketchup

Can Malnutrition Be Solved With Enriched Condiments?

OK, that, but…

Ted Cruz & Marco Rubio humiliate themselves on Cuba: Inside their Guantanamo hypocrisy - Salon.com

"It’s absolutely true that the most most notorious prison camp on the planet is in Cuba — but it’s run by the U.S. Government. "

Indeed

Mourir pour Sony? | The XX Committee

"Apparently we are supposed to regard the cancellation of a dumb movie as The Worst Thing Ever, since it involves surrender to an ugly regime and its evil ways. The great and the good are now exhorting President Obama to do something about this outrage and teach North Korea to behave. The hideousness of Pyongyang is no more ‘news’ than learning that Hollywood is full of idiots. What exactly the moral outrage contingent wants Washington, DC. to do about Sony’s prostration before the prophets of juche is far from clear."

Ya think?

Sony’s International Incident: Making Kim Jong-un’s Head Explode - NYTimes.com

"Sony’s executives now say they knew that basing a film on the assassination of a living national leader — even a ruthless dictator — had inherent risks."

Based on Sony’s trailer for the movie, The Interview, (maybe it’s still around, maybe it got yanked along with the film itself), we just might owe North Korea a debt of gratitude here. And I don’t mean just for the juicy executive quotes. Either that or possibly I’m just out of touch with what’s funny these days. (OK, you can put your hands down now.)

The usual suspects

Marco Rubio’s fury over the Cuba shift shows why Obama made the right move - The Washington Post

"He threatened to use his new position as a subcommittee chairman on the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to block the nomination of an ambassador to Cuba and the building of an embassy there, and he said the better policy would be to increase the Soviet-era sanctions."

File under Stuff You Can Never Unsee

Chicago taxi drivers pose in risqué calendar - NY Daily News

And how many student loans would that be?

Michigan offers Harbaugh 6-year, $48 million deal - NY Daily News

Of course, for $48 million maybe they could finally beat Ohio State, so maybe it’s worth it after all.

First things first

U.S.-Cuba deal caps cigar imports at $100, bans tourism - NY Daily News

"The new U.S.-Cuba deal ends a long-standing ban on importing Cuban tobacco and eases traditionally tense travel bans — but bringing back cigars in bulk and tourism are still off limits.

"The policy change, annouced Wednesday, allows American travelers to bring back $400 worth of goods from Cuba, but it puts a $100 cap on tobacco and alcohol.…

"Plus, $100 doesn't go very far: In Cuba, a box of Cohibas runs between $130 and $150, Welsch estimated."

Any chance of bringing this guy back?

Barry Goldwater - Wikiquote

"Mark my word, if and when these preachers get control of the [Republican] party, and they're sure trying to do so, it's going to be a terrible damn problem. Frankly, these people frighten me. Politics and governing demand compromise. But these Christians believe they are acting in the name of God, so they can't and won't compromise. I know, I've tried to deal with them."

Never thought I’d be nostalgic for Goldwater. (A lot more at the link, above.)

12.17.2014

Already

Jeb Bush Wants a Tougher Cuban Embargo | Mother Jones

"It's no surprise that Bush pounced to attack the shift in policy. A few weeks ago, Bush said that the current prohibitions on travel and trade are too loose and that the US government should clamp down harder on the Castro regime."

I have no idea

Merry Christmas, Fox News; this'll keep you going at least until the end of the year

Undernews: America finally talking with Cuba

"US and Cuba are to start talks to normalise diplomatic ties in a historic shift in relations between the two countries, media reports say.…

"US President Barack Obama is making a statement later. "

Da Coach on Da Bears

4 Downs with Ditka: 'I turned the game off' | Chicago Sun-Times

Can we get a do-over?

Chocolate Chip Mint: Anything?

Now we get to the really terrifying stuff

Trebek threatened to quit ‘Jeopardy’: Sony emails | Page Six

Our fearless forecast

Jeb Bush and the Base: It’s More About Persona Than Policies - NYTimes.com

"Mr. Bush could still win even if Tea Party supporters opposed him by a wide margin."

If Bush declares he will win the Republican primary and very possibly win the 2016 general election, especially if his opponent then is Clinton. There. Let’s not have any more discussion of this: That’s our story and we’re sticking to it.

ADD: This this was posted before I learned about today’s announcements involving relations with Cuba. I’m doubling down.

Who cares where it comes from? Let's build a pipeline!

There may actually be life on Mars, according to Curiosity’s new methane data | ExtremeTech

"This methane, which was detected by the Curiosity rover, can only really come from two places: Geological activity… or life."

As long as it doesn’t come through here. We’re opposed to pipelines here. Also, we’re opposed to any source of energy except, currently, the sun. So we’re hoping it stops raining soon.

If we could do fracking on Mars, we might be OK with that.

Yoo runs for cover

Torture memo author John Yoo admits CIA may have gone too far

"John Yoo, the former Justice Department lawyer who authored a series of notorious memos cited by the Bush administration to justify the torture of terrorism detainees, acknowledged on Sunday that the CIA may have broken the law."

Is it too late for Occupy Parking?

Greenfield to hold lottery for “premium” parking permits | The Recorder

"Lane Kelly, Greenfield’s finance director, said the town will designate about half of the spaces in four of the town’s downtown parking lots as ‘premium’ spaces in an effort to open up space and make it easier for people who shop, dine, volunteer or go to the movies to find a place to park. They also aim to make it easier to find parking for people who plan to take the train when Amtrak returns to Greenfield."

A triumph of medical science

John McCain: The Anti-Cheney on Torture - NYTimes.com

"Last Friday, after the publication of the Senate Intelligence Committee report on the Central Intelligence Agency’s history of torture and deceit post-9/11, Senator John McCain, the Arizona Republican who was tortured as a prisoner in North Vietnam, appeared on the Charlie Rose show.

"Watching was like taking an anti-Cheney pill."

12.16.2014

I sailed to France on thiis ship in 1958

SS United States is being prepared for a new life

"The SS United States was launched in 1952 as the world's fastest ocean liner, and it still holds the record for speediest trans-Atlantic voyage. The ship was partially funded by the Navy with the idea that it could be converted one day into an extremely efficient troop transporter."

Who says the universe is expanding?

No, this is not suspicious or anything

Men Who Love Spicy Food Have More Testosterone | TIME

Sounds fair to me

Native American Council Offers Amnesty to 220 Million Undocumented Whites - The Daily Currant

"'Any white person with a criminal record, however, will be deported in the next 90 days back to their ancestral homeland. Rush Limbaugh will be going to Germany. Justin Bieber will depart for Canada. And the entire cast of Jersey Shore will be returning to Italy.'"

Now nut rage? Really?

Korean Air to be sanctioned for nut rage cover-up - Yahoo News

"Cho, who was head of cabin service at Korean Air, ordered a senior flight attendant off a Dec. 5 flight after she was served macadamia nuts in a bag, instead of on a plate, in what she thought was a breach of service protocol in first class."

The high speed train from Vermont…

…will finally be here December 22, we’re told, although it won’t actually be from Vermont, it’ll  be from right here. The Vermont part has been indefinitely postponed and maybe, just maybe, changed to Montreal. But just three days before Christmas, the high speed train will be here. Santa Claus won’t be aboard. The Governor will.

Down at the John W. Olver International Bus Station work is furiously underway to build a platform beside the track. The track runs right by the bus station which, when it was built a few years ago with stimulus money, was intended to be a train station too, but nobody thought to build the platform because it was imagined back then, we suppose, the train would never actually arrive. But now we know it will. December 22.

There’s no time (and perhaps no money) to build a permanent platform by the track so construction of a temporary platform is hurriedly underway. From the looks of it, it’s intended to be temporary for a long, long time.

But no matter. The high speed train will leave from here on December 22 around 1:30 PM and arrive in New York City about 6:30, in plenty of time for a fashionably late East Coast supper and perhaps a show. There is no return train until the next morning, so take your jammies if you go.

Yes. The high speed train will whisk you from here to New York City in five hours flat. Or, if you prefer, you can drive it (according to Google) in a little over three.

Rah rah

A Not-So-Brief and Extremely Sordid History of Cheerleading | Mother Jones

"1911: Harvard President A. Lawrence Lowell describes cheerleading as 'the worst means of expressing emotion ever invented.' In response, The Nation defends the activity: 'The reputation of having been a valiant 'cheer-leader' is one of the most valuable things a boy can take away from college. As a title to promotion in professional or public life, it ranks hardly second to that of being a quarterback.'"

Gotta love that Wisconsin cuisine

Wisconsin man tells fish story during drunken driving stop | Reuters

"(Reuters) - A Wisconsin man told a sheriff's deputy he had not been drinking, but rather eating beer-battered fish when he was pulled over for what could be his 10th drunken driving offense, according to an incident report released on Wednesday."

12.15.2014

This may be as funny as it gets the rest of this year

Sony demands halt to reporting from leaked documents | Reuters

"The studio 'does not consent to your possession, review, copying, dissemination, publication, uploading, downloading or making any use' of the information, Boies wrote in the letter, according to the New York Times report."

John Yoo's Come-to-Jesus moment

Even Torture Memo Author John Yoo Thinks Rectal Feeding Was Illegal

Take a Monday night off

Chicago Bears host New Orleans Saints Monday night | abc7chicago.com

"It's a matchup between two of the league's most disappointing teams."

Ouch

The Insiders: Lena Dunham, another example of the left’s decay - The Washington Post

"As best I can tell, Lena Dunham is the Miley Cyrus of condescending, phony intellectuals."

Just for people older than you

Lost in the Fifties- Another Time, Another Place - Safeshare.TV

12.14.2014

A treat

Paris, City of Light, in Black and White (Photos) - The Daily Beast

Just as we suspected

Yak Dung Is Making Climate Change Worse

"Cult hit" is almost always a bad sign, moviewise

26 Streaming Shows You Should Get Addicted to This Winter | TIME

"After many requests, Netflix secured the rights to the newest British cult hit Happy Valley."

“British cult hit” is just plain terrifying.

A matter of definition

Opinion: The case against publishing hacked Sony e-mails - CSMonitor.com

"We’re not talking about whistleblowing or related matters of political import where important discussions need to be had. This is nothing more than privacy evisceration courtesy of media opportunism."

When we’re talking about my stuff it’s privacy.

When we’re talking about your stuff it’s transparency.

See how that works?

End-of-year lists are even more boring that everyday lists, except maybe a few

The Least Fascinating People of 2014 - NY Daily News

"Down here in the tabloid trenches, we also must deal daily with people who somehow keep getting their names in the news, but who hold, frankly, no fascination whatsoever."

Trickshot Dick misses again

Dick Cheney Was Lying About Torture - Mark Fallon - POLITICO Magazine

"As special agent in charge of the criminal investigation task force with investigators and intelligence personnel at Guantanamo Bay, Afghanistan, and Iraq, I was privy to the information provided by Khalid Sheik Mohammed. I was aware of no valuable information that came from waterboarding.…Cheney’s claim that the frequent waterboarding of Khalid Sheikh Mohammed ‘produced phenomenal results for us' is simply false."

This whole “torture works” crowd is just plain embarrassing.