A walk in the afternoon

I can see, believe me…

…I can see wanting to get this year over with as soon as possible, but do you really think starting Christmas in June will do the trick? Or is it some other kind of stocking you have in mind?

Looking at you, CVS.

This year, the mud bowl

Because of historic rains, less than half the normal amount of corn has been planted in Illinois. The next weeks are make or break for farmers. - Chicago Tribune

http://bit.ly/2QYsKJF

Troublemakers, those kids

Schools are using mass surveillance techniques on kids, new report shows
As always, the move to keep people "safe" is actually a massive invasion of privacy.

"Privacy went out the window in the last five years," he said. "We're a part of that. For the good of society, for protecting kids."

Read in Reclaim The Net: https://apple.news/AvfVxhKkMTw2npiH6ks7oJQ

There's always a special ingredient that makes it, well, special

Alcohol is now being marketed as a 'wellness' drink

The golden ale is made in part with Himalayan sea salt — which helps to replenish your body with electrolytes.

https://nyp.st/2QRGllW

PS.Where is the Himalayan Sea anyway? I can't seem to find it on my map app.

Great Lakes keep getting greater

The Great Lakes are overflowing with record amounts of water - The Washington Post

https://wapo.st/2WRIfs6

Do they keep changing the rules on this or am I just not paying attention?

The Democratic Debate Lineup Gets Shuffled (And Some Good News For Mike Gravel) | FiveThirtyEight

With Bennet in and Bullock out, that makes 20 Democrats, by our count, who are now qualified for the first two primary debates. That's a significant milestone, because the debates are capped at 20 total participants.³ 

https://53eig.ht/2QQnZBG

OK, it's true I'm not paying attention, much. I figure by the time the primary voting gets around to this state there won't be more than three or four of them left which means that 16 of them, at least, I will never have to know a thing about. Which is a blessing, for sure.

Still, 20? Why not 27. Or 31? What if the person we really want is number 48? What if it's you? (You might be in the top 48, or maybe not.)

Seems kind of arbitrary, 20.

Could this be the next weight-loss fad?

How many calories are in plastic?

Americans May Be Ingesting Thousands of Microplastics Every Year | Smart News | Smithsonian

Measuring less than five millimeters in length, microplastics derive from a variety of sources, including large plastics that break down into smaller and smaller pieces.

[Ed. Yep, that makes sense.]

http://bit.ly/2WTZmtp

Statues!

Put coward Florida cop in prison, and who's next? The social worker? The teacher? The politician? - Chicago Tribune

Since we're all about shaming, let's do it right. With statues. How better to immortalize an offender than gleaming marble?

The ancient Greeks had a word for it. They called the statues "Zanes." These were placed at Olympia, where athletes competing in the Olympic Games would see the Zanes immortalizing cheaters.

http://bit.ly/2QRYakO

Imagine our relief

All seems good in Tom Brady's universe – Boston Herald

http://bit.ly/2WL0uzD

My doorbell has been broken for 25 years: Tell me how this is "millennial"

Millennials explain why they don't use doorbells anymore

https://on.today.com/2WQAwuv

(OK, maybe the last millennium.)

…and then they came after the ice cream trucks…

Operation Meltdown: NYC seizes dozens of ice cream trucks - CNN

https://cnn.it/2QQ48me

And you spray it on your armpits

Xbox deodorant, body wash let you smell like a gamer

…this scent features "top notes of kaffir lime and winter lemon, aromatic herbal middle notes of mint and sage, and woody bottom notes of patchouli and clearwood," GameSpot reports.

https://nyp.st/2WSDNcy

Why not just get some of that orange-colored cheese and mix it with a little cola?

Warren goes after the No. 2

'No loyalty or allegiance to America': Warren targets multinationals in economic platform

Warren named names — calling out Levi's, Dixon Ticonderoga (manufacturer of the distinctive No. 2 pencil) and General Electric for moving factories outside the United States.

 in POLITICO: https://apple.news/A6f0gTTUiQbWfMswN9DUg4g

Well, you know, Harvard and all that.

Congress intends to investigate "Big Tech"

Quote Details: Will Rogers: 

http://bit.ly/2QTC9lT

(Don't get me wrong. Big Tech has a lot to answer for. But so does Congress.)

Who even knew they had 400 roads in Missouri?

Nearly 400 Missouri roads closed by flooding

KANSAS CITY, Mo. (AP) — The swollen Mississippi River is straining levees, snarling traffic and forcing people from their ...

Read the full story

Sent from AP News. Download now on the App Store or Google Play

(I used to know someone from Missouri, named Candy, but she pronounced it "Misery.")

The end is near

Swalwell wants to impeach Barr, Mnuchin - Axios

http://bit.ly/2KobfBh

Now it's a race to see who can want to impeach more people than the last guy. Why not start with everybody and work up from there?

Also, in other end news, Amazon's new show, "Good Omens," is a blast. I'm going to keep mentioning this until you watch it.

You don't see any New England airports on this list

Travelers left close to $1 million at TSA airport checkpoints last year

https://cnb.cx/2KoOUDu

19th Century clickbait

"Barnum's American Museum was so popular that people would spend the entire day there. This cut into profits, as the museum would be too full to squeeze another person in. In classic Barnum style, old P.T. put up signs that said 'This Way to the Egress.' Many customers followed the signs, not realizing that Egress was a fancy word for 'Exit.'"

http://www.ptbarnum.org/egress.html

And while we're at it…

…our entertainment editor, Helen Gone, especially highly recommends Amazon's new original episodic show, Good Omens.