Hope you weren't expecting a Lamborghini for Christmas

Watch a Lamborghini get torn apart by the Taiwanese government

https://goo.gl/uPDHcI

No hot news

Just because we say celebration doesn't mean…

Excessive celebration penalty helps Grambling State win Celebration Bowl

"The Celebration Bowl played between the champions of the Mid-Eastern Athletic Conference and the Southwestern Athletic Conference and is considered the HBCU national championship."

This is like when you call tech support because your internet is down…

A small Indiana town doesn’t have a police force because all its officers just quit - The Washington Post

The sign, posted on the glass window of the police department, reads: “The Town is currently without the Police Department. In the case of an emergency, please call 911.”

…and you get a recording that says “check our web site."

Thanks, G

Work-avoiding cat gets perfect gig

Library cat outlasts councilman that wanted him gone - CBS News

Councilman Clements eventually ran out of his nine lives after he was defeated in a landslide in November’s election.

Mayor Ron White says as far as he’s concerned, Browser’s job title is now “Library Cat for Life.”

Sounds like time for a celebratory snooze to me.

Our dietary tip for today

Going out to shovel snow in the morning is a great way to build up an appetite for MORE BREAKFAST. And the way the snow’s coming down right now, I’m going to need MORE more breakfast before lunch. 

In the parlance of newspaper writers this is a heavy snow, because to them, heavy means deep. This one is going to be pretty deep except, of course, on the sidewalk, which has already been shoveled once, soon twice, and as many more times as the eggs hold out. But it’s not heavy heavy, it’s actually light, because it’s cold.

And yes, there’s a lot of physics in that but maybe I’ll need a little nap before we talk about it.

Also solves the problem of what to do with a snowy weekend

[Thanks to Formerly Upstairs Cathy.]

Here's a new one

Freezing fog. 

Winter in this part of New England is a mess.

Nonsense from the hapless D's

Clinton, Obama increasingly point to Russia to help explain her loss - The Washington Post

https://goo.gl/6Cjcew

Possibly the Democrats don't have mirrors, and that's why they still don't get the reason they lost the recent presidential election. 

In order to believe Clinton's loss was due to the Russians or to the FBI or to some other external villain, a person has to believe said villain was able, somehow, to swing just enough votes in just enough of just the right states (Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Michigan, etc.) to eke out an electoral victory in the face of Clinton's rather substantial popular vote win.

And if you believe that, I have a bridge in Brooklyn I'd like to show you.

Nothing new under the sun

Donald Trump's Children Wouldn't Be the First Presidential Kids to Work in the White House - TIME

"Sixteen children of presidents worked in the White House with their fathers, by the count of Doug Wead, a former adviser to Presidents George H.W. Bush and George W. Bush and author of All the President's Children, and even more had unofficial influence."

https://goo.gl/TzRjkJ

Now, making work more avoidable than ever before…

You can now control Netflix using Google Home - The Verge

…you no longer have to go to all the trouble of pushing the button on your TV zapper, you can just say “let’s watch that show where all the people shuffle around like they’re supposed to be dead or something” and it will take you right to the Bears game. Just like that.

Not taking a back seat to those pesky Russians…

Yahoo Says 1 Billion User Accounts Were Hacked

SAN FRANCISCO — Yahoo, already reeling from its September disclosure that 500 million user accounts had been hacked in 2014, disclosed Wednesday that a different attack in 2013 compromised more than 1 billion accounts. 

The two attacks are the largest known security breaches of one company’s computer network.

NYTimes 

A little nippy in Duluth

Redolent …

…is our word for the day (https://goo.gl/Gm96Yn), as in redolent of skunk. Whew. We had a reekish crop of 'em this year. Seems like every morning we get reminded, redolently.

Let's try for squirrels next year.

Feeling a little lonely there, Bunky?

Microsoft is creating talking bots that will call you on Skype - The Verge

https://goo.gl/eAkQGL

Yes

Will a quinoa vending machine ruin New York? | New York Post

https://goo.gl/mGgTPL

More oil, fewer squeaks

From Reuters News:

Trump to pick former Texas Governor Perry as Energy Secretary

The choice, confirmed late on Monday by the official, adds to the list of oil drilling advocates skeptical about climate change who have been picked for senior positions in Trump's Cabinet. The selections have worried environmentalists but cheered an industry eager for expansion.

Justice is justice and there's just no two ways about it

Soccer plane crash survivors fined $30K for missing match | New York Post

"The final round of the Brazilian championship was held Dec. 1, but a match against Atletico Mineiro was canceled because of the tragedy, the Mirror of the UK reported.

"But the Superior Court of Justice decided to punish both Chapecoense and Mineiro for failing to play their match, the paper reported."

Also, the crash could have been avoided if the pilot had landed someplace before it happened.

Don’t tell me that isn’t true.

Nwrdlls

Fortunately all this modern technology we’re fooling around with hasn’t improved my spelling one bit. Or (you wouldn’t expect this, would you?) my penmanship.There’s autocorrect, of course, but I routinely outplay that.

I think of this as a feature, not a bug. There’s no computing how much work I’ve avoided just by failing to write myself intelligible notes. 

Back in the day, before the invention of Times New Roman, I had a little whiteboard magneted to the front of my fridge. On it was scrawled the word, Nwrdlls, like some obscure hieroglyphic unearthed from the desert sands. Noodles was what it meant, but by the time I figured that out I no longer needed nwrdlls so I erased it and went on with my life. One trip to  the grocery store saved.

The whiteboard turned out to be unnecessary; I can do the same thing on my phone any time or the day or night. One of the items currently on my todo list is Block the for mail. I’m marking it complete right now, and taking a nap.

See how easy?

Don't mess with Green Bay in December

Are the Seahawks still Super Bowl contenders? They didn't look it in Green Bay.

The Washington Post

Russell Wilson threw five interceptions and the Seattle defense struggled without injured safety Earl Thomas. 

Read the full story

The Verge plays the old mushroom cloud card

What's standing between Donald Trump and nuclear war?

The Verge

The main barriers to using nuclear weapons are psychological, not legal 

Read the full story

Imagine W's grin. 

New England winter arrives

If I'm reading this forecast correctly, it's going to snow 3 to 6 inches during the night and then rain. Perfect. And did I mention it'll be below freezing the whole time?

Winter's here, and it's not even winter yet.

Words people use when they want you to think they're more important than they really are

Trump, CIA on collision course over Russia's role in U.S. election - The Washington Post

"We want to make sure we brief Congress and relevant stakeholders, like possibly state administrators who actually operationalize the elections," White House spokesman Eric Schultz told reporters Friday.

https://goo.gl/LgmXcK