Friday toons

Is it a good thing or bad…

…when the black cat doesn't cross your path but just walks right past, going the other way, without so much as a nod?

Here's a guy who's right on top of the news, huh?

Trevor Noah: Trump Would Be a Bad POTUS

The Daily Beast

Read the full story

Please make it stop

Hil and Kaine: An Adorably Benign Ticket
The Daily Beast

ANNANDALE, Va. — They say that in a democracy, we get the candidates we deserve. Perhaps that is why on a sweltering Thursday afternoon in Northern Virginia, the former Secretary of State and presumptive Democratic nominee to be President of the United States felt it was necessary to make a dad-joke about Pokemon Go. Hillary began addressing a packed gymnasium and, in her typical Hillary style, extolled the virtues of free community college and early childhood education. Then this happened: "I Read the full story

If Hillary Clinton is our national grandma, then he is America's youth pastor.


Homestead Act? Sounds more like Florida to me

NYTimes: Russia Looks to Populate Its Far East. Wimps Need Not Apply.

KAMEN-RYBOLOV, Russia — Standing ankle deep in mud in a swampy grassland more than 4,000 miles from his home, Yuri A. Bugaev surveyed a mosquito-infested wasteland that the Russian government is offering to would-be pioneers under its own modern-day version of the 1862 Homestead Act in the United States.

Ahh, for the good old days

1968 Was Worse Calm Down Doom Mongers | National Review

But telling people that we're on the verge of civil war is a good business model. 

Read the full story

Bushes pout (he did give Jeb quite a thumping, it's true)

Here are the Republicans who aren't going to Donald Trump's convention

The empty seats at the convention further illustrate the growing divide between the GOP's leadership and its voters. Read the full story

Will the Vikings get to see the duck?

Largest Viking ship, headed to Duluth, must pay $400K or turn back - StarTribune.com

In Duluth, the Draken was to have been one of several tall ships from around the world on display, along with the World's Largest Rubber Duck. 

Read the full story

Two ways out of the national suicide pact

Can't vote for Trump or Clinton? You have 2 legitimate alternatives

Can't vote for Trump or Clinton? You have 2 legitimate alternativesChicago Tribune:

Negative views of Mrs. Clinton are at least 12 percentage points higher than those of any of the four Democratic nominees since 1992," reported The Wall Street Journal about recent poll results. "Negative views of Mr. Trump are at least 14 points worse than those of any of the last five GOP nominees." That was before FBI Director James Comey called Clinton's behavior "extremely careless" and Trump offered peculiar praise to Saddam Hussein as a prolific slayer of terrorists. (Trump didn't mention that Hussein also was adept at slaying his own people.)


Selling to the zombie people

How Pokémon Go might become a billion-dollar business | New York Post

Is Ginsberg a Pats fan?

Tom Brady ban upheld — next stop: Supreme Court? | New York Post

Are we the only country in which "dark money" is a thing?

Super PAC And Dark Money Spending Already Tops $100 Million In Fight For Senate Control
The Huffington Post - US

WASHINGTON ― Super PACs and nonprofit groups aligned with Republicans may be shying away from supporting Donald Trump, their controversial presumptive party nominee. But that doesn't mean they're sitting out the 2016 elections entirely. ... 

In almost every state where control of the Senate is at stake, groups aligned with Republicans dominate.

Read the full story

And ate all the porridge as well

Colorado deputies free bear that apparently locked itself inside car
Fox News

Authorities in Colorado were involved in a wild incident Tuesday morning after a bear broke into a car in the woods. 

The bear destroyed the inside of the car and it had to be towed away. The teen wasn't sure what she was going to do about the car; some insurance agencies claim that an incident with a wild animal is an "Act of God," according to KDVR-TV.

Read the full story



From Reuters News:

New Black Panthers to carry arms to Cleveland: chairman

Police in Dallas, where Texas's "open carry" law allows civilians to carry guns in public, said seeing multiple people carrying rifles led them initially to believe they were under attack by multiple shooters.

If this is true, we're all lucky it wasn't an even worse blood – bath.

Bernie kisses the ring

Entering the high school gymnasium together and waving and shaking hands along the rope line and from the stage, Mrs. Clinton and Mr. Sanders stood before a giant American flag image flanked by Mrs. Clinton's motto, "UNINDICTED" [oops no, "Stronger Together."]

Sounds like a perfect match

NYTimes: James Stavridis, Retired Admiral, Is Being Vetted as Hillary Clinton's Running Mate

In 2012, Mr. Stavridis was investigated for having improperly used a military aircraft to fly with his wife to an exclusive party in Burgundy, France with winemakers.…

The Pentagon inspector general's report ultimately concluded that he had failed to exercise sufficient oversight over staff members, and had made several bookkeeping mistakes.


The most clueless out of touch old geezer on Earth

Apparently is moi. See, I'm at the drugstore when a little girl, maybe two or so, scampers around the end of the aisle and starts talking to me in that way little kids have of sounding like they're talking but not saying any real words. I used to know another little girl with similar skills so I play along.

Hi, I say.

And then, because she's holding in her hands a small, pink stuffed animal of some sort, I add…

I like your pig.

Whereupon this little girl launches into a stern and heartfelt frowning lecture and I come to understand this animal she's holding is not (not!) a pig. It's a…


Who knew?

You, right?

Me, I am never going to guess pig again.

Imagine our shock

Red Hot Chili Peppers were confused for Metallica in Belarus - NY Daily News

Sleep better tonight

We're winning the war on ISIS' Twitter traffic | New York Post


Could we get them to take a look at Hillary?

From Reuters News:

German prosecutors say won't be lenient with VW

(Sorry, couldn't resist it.)

Go, money!

From Reuters News:

S&P 500 touches record intraday high

The S&P 500 touched a record intraday high of 2,137.43 points at the open on Monday after a strong monthly jobs report last week boosted confidence in the U.S. economy.


Hillary should feel right at home

From Reuters News:

Obama says U.S. government must improve cyber security

U.S. President Barack Obama said on Sunday that the U.S. government has to improve its cyber security practices for the modern age of smart phones and other technology, saying that hackers had targeted the White House.

"We have to do better, we have to learn from mistakes," Obama told a news conference in Madrid. "We know that we have had hackers in the White House," he added.

Hillary: She's Unindicted!