You gotta be there

PHOTOS: Dyeing the Chicago River green for St. Patrick's Day | Chicago

"The Plumbers Local 130 will be doing their usual dyeing of the Chicago River on Saturday at noon."

Hillary's horns

34 TIME Magazine Covers That Appeared to Give People Horns | TIME

"There was some hubbub online Thursday over TIME’s latest cover, which appeared to show Hillary Clinton sporting a set of horns."

It's Pi Day: Let's sing along

3.141592653589793… [AUDIO]

It's a joke, right?

It got lost in the translation

Colombian mayor hires male strippers for Women's Day event - NY Daily News

You are what you know (or don't)

Schneier on Security: Threats to Information Integrity

"In the future, however, we might also see more cyber operations that will change or manipulate electronic information in order to compromise its integrity (i.e. accuracy and reliability) instead of deleting it or disrupting access to it."

Time for a little rant

The George W. Bush email scandal the media has conveniently forgotten - Salon.com

Or, in other words:

“You started it."

“No, you started it"

“Mommeee!"

We get it. Everybody’s got the Interweb now and can look stuff up. So no matter what happens, we’re sure to find out somebody did it first (Ecclesiastes 1:9). 

The article here noted, about the so-called Bush email scandal, is a defense of the looming Clinton email scandal, something about lost or deleted messages, which is not really a problem at all because if Clinton did actually delete any of her emails, we can always get copies from Bejing, or Moscow, or Tel Aviv. And who knows where else. (Surely the Republicans in Congress, accustomed as they are to dealing with foreign governments, can accomplish this.)

But no matter. I’m just getting freaking annoyed by this current trend toward turning every topic of discussion into just another playground squabble. It’s time to grow up.

No dummy, this one

Indian bride walks out of wedding when groom fails math test

"The question she asked: How much is 15 plus six?"

National blink?

What Happens When an Eclipse Hits the World's Most Solar-Powered Country? | Mother Jones

"'Some of the hype ahead of the eclipse served to focus minds,' said Andreas Kramer, a senior fellow at the Institute for Advanced Sustainability Studies in Potsdam."

Borowitz: Kim Jong-un "snubbed"

Kim Jong-un Feels Snubbed by Absence of Letter from Republicans - The New Yorker

"In an unusually forthcoming interview with the Korean Central News Agency (K.C.N.A.), Kim said it was ‘hurtful’ that the Republicans would send a letter to one of the United States’ most longstanding enemies while ‘totally snubbing’ another."

(We feel constrained to point out Borowitz writes SATIRE, boys and girls.)

Hey! Take it easy on the geezers here!

Florida golfers undeterred by large alligator on putting green | Reuters

"'This gentleman is well into his 80s. He wouldn't even know Photoshop,' Zada said."

Can 47 Republican congresscritters be put back in the bottle?

Khamenei condemns Republican letter on Iran, bemoans U.S. 'tricks' | Reuters

"(Reuters) - Iran's Supreme Leader hit out on Thursday at a letter by U.S. Republican senators threatening to undo any nuclear deal between Washington and Tehran, saying he was worried because the United States was known for "backstabbing", Mehr news agency reported.…

"The letter signed by 47 Republican senators warned Iran that any nuclear deal made with U.S. President Barack Obama, a Democrat, could last only as long as he remained in office - an unusual intervention into U.S. foreign policy-making."

It's not exactly the Arctic ice, but it's receding anyway

Geezers are too lazy to use email

John McCain, Chuck Schumer's Email Habits Are Embarrassing | The New Republic

"When an old person refuses to send an email, it doesn’t mean the work goes away. It means two or more millennials have to send, oh, six emails to work around the problem. "

Wait. What?

Lowering the bar

Remember when the Bush administration conveniently lost five million private emails? The media sure doesn't http://t.co/HvOShoLPIn

— Salon.com (@Salon) March 12, 2015

Because how else can we shoot armored deer?

ATF backs down from ban on armor-piercing bullets for AR-15s - NY Daily News

"The ATF caved on its proposed rule against so-called cop-killer bullets after receiving more than 80,000 comments on the proposed regulation, the vast majority opposed to the rule. Many gun rights advocates called the measure a backroom gun control move by the Obama administration."

Facing the competition

Soccer goalie takes repeated shots to the face in this stupid, delightful video | For The Win

Noted by Some Guy in Seattle.

Everybody wants to read them

AP sues State Department, seeking access to Clinton records

"The legal action comes after repeated requests filed under the U.S. Freedom of Information Act have gone unfulfilled. They include one request AP made five years ago and others pending since the summer of 2013."

Maybe she should get out of politics and just write emails.

A whole technology comes and goes without my even noticing

Selfie stick bans go into effect at French, UK attractions - Yahoo News

"critics say they are obnoxious and potentially dangerous"

Ya think?

Republicans Admit: That Iran Letter Was a Dumb Idea - The Daily Beast

"But even among Republicans whose offices have signed the letter, there is some trepidation that the Iran letter injects partisanship into the Iran negotiations…"

Can’t put one over on these guys.

“The administration has no sense of humor when it comes to how weakly they have been handling these negotiations,” said a top GOP Senate aide."

Maybe not. But me, I’m LMAO.

Officially we're not mentioning

Wow--that's an @nypost cover for the books; re- Hillary email woes pic.twitter.com/ykwfhifRXL
— Elizabeth Cherneff (@echerneff) March 11, 2015

I stepped in a puddle this morning…

…in the dark. Do you know what that means? It means the temp was above freezing at 6:30 A freaking M. 6:30. It’s been a long time since that’s happened, right? Also, the snow has melted so much the pile the plows left along the curb is not much more than waist deep.

This is very good.

When in Rome, don't

Two women, desperate for original selfie, carve initials into Rome's Colosseum - CNET

"It's one thing to take a selfie at Italy's beautiful historic landmark. But how can you make it sufficiently unmissable so that you get at least 10 'likes'?"

The bridge named Bob

Getting Personal – Futility Closet

"The town council held a naming contest and received 85 suggestions, including Avon Crossing and Del Mayre Bridge. It was 32-year-old construction worker Louie Sullivan who said, ‘Oh, heck, just name it Bob,’ a suggestion that set city manager Bill James ‘laughing so hard he had to leave the room.’"

Deviled

Ohio home pelted by eggs for a year; police can't crack case

"EUCLID, Ohio — An 85-year-old man says his suburban Cleveland home has been pelted with eggs several times a week for a year, and police haven't been able to crack the unusual case despite stakeouts, questioning neighbors, installing a surveillance camera and even testing eggshells as evidence."

Good point

If I wanted to spend $10,000 on something that'll be obsolete in three years I'd buy an engagement ring!!!!! #applewatch
— patrick (@pattymo) March 9, 2015

And more.

More of the NY Daily News editorial re: Senators' "open letter" to Iran

Editorial: Un-patriot games - NY Daily News

"We join GOP signatories in opposing the pact as outlined, but we strenuously condemn their betrayal of the U.S. constitutional system.

"The participants represented the bulk of the Republicans’ 54-member senatorial majority, vesting their petulant, condescending stunt with the coloration of an institutional foreign policy statement.

"They are an embarrassment to the Senate and to the nation."

Our guess: Today is the last day for this icicle

Say goodbye.

At least there's somebody else old enough to remember Dick Tracy

Oh yeah, and that other thing.

(Meanwhile, Apple's watch may be cool—and expensive—but it's by no means the first "smart watch" to market. Me, I can see how it might have been useful to me 30 years ago but now, not so much. Plus, another Apple gadget has got me out of the habit of wearing a watch at all. Why go back?

(OK, maybe "gadget" is not the most accurate word, but YKWIM.)

Chicken break

Imagine the shock

I don’t have a lot of teeth so I don’t need a lot of toothbrushes. The one I’d been using for quite a while, though, was beginning to get a little bedraggled. Or possibly worse.

So I stopped to buy a new one and the cheapest one I could find cost three dollars and fifty freaking  cents. No kidding. $3.50. For a toothbrush. These days, it turns out, you can spend eight or nine bucks on a toothbrush that doesn’t even require a battery. Really. What.

A two-digit morning

It was 18º when I got up this morning. So not only two digits; one of them was big. And it might hit 40º by afternoon, which means most of the rest of the ice might fall off the house. 

We take pleasure in such small signs of progress. We have a whole lot more progress to make.

Make that two

XKCD

Don't worry

‘Huge gaps’ in Clinton emails: Chairman of House Benghazi Committee | New York Post

"‘It strains credibility to believe that if you’re on your way to Libya to discuss Libyan policy, that there’s not a single document that’s been turned over to Congress,’ said Gowdy, who issued subpoenas last week for Clinton’s Libya e-mails."

Some day they’ll be found in an old cardboard box, in the attic. Oops.

We’ve all been there before.

We're saying "chicken wings" and "Omaha"

Florida Officials Ban The Term 'Climate Change' | ThinkProgress

"Florida’s Department of Environmental Protection is tasked with protecting the state’s ‘air, water and land.’ But there’s one environmental threat you won’t hear DEP officials talking about.

"Officials at Florida’s DEP have banned the words ‘climate change’ and ‘global warming’ from all official communications…"

Also, “sustainability.” 

At least we agree on something.

Crashing smashing big chunks of ice…

…falling off the roof this afternoon. Icicles. Still a lot more left, but it's a start. If the forecast holds, we'll be over freezing for at least some time each day this coming week. That should take care of the roof. Next, the sidewalks.

It's time to re-wax the boots. Some people use mink oil or neetsfoot oil or even silicone on leather but I'm old school. I use beeswax. It works just fine. And there are a lot of deep puddles on the sidewalks and crossings right now. Good boots mean dry feet.

Dry feet are good.

Warmer, but…

…might take a while to melt this:

Imagine our dismay

The World Has Extracted More Crude Oil Than It Knows What to Do With

"If the trend continues, the storage problem could reach its tipping point: U.S. tanks may be completely full by mid-April, causing the price of fuel to plummet even further than its recent slide, according to the Associated Press."

Microsleep? Is this a new word for nap?

After daylight saving time shift, beware of 'microsleeps' (+video) - CSMonitor.com

"Sleep scientists say effects of the shift can include a pernicious phenomenon known as ‘microsleeps,’ or momentary losses of concentration at critical times."

Well, not exactly. But I think I might finally know what I want to be when I grow up: A sleep scientist! Now that we’re finally off Daylight Wasting Time, I just might go do a little microsleeping myself.

They have less snow in Anchorage than we have here (and it's warmer, too)

Too warm for dogs in Anchorage - Al Jazeera English

"This is a racing disaster; snow has been imported in trucks to cover 4th Avenue in downtown Anchorage for the starting spectacle."