9.26.2016

Required reading for "Debate" Day


There's No Debate - BillMoyers.com

https://goo.gl/c1JjZ8

Is Clinton a heightest?

Clinton to use a custom lectern to reduce height difference with Trump | New York Post

https://goo.gl/djTnqH

[Or maybe it's a Democrat thing—read on.]

9.25.2016

Is there no escape?


The debate will be broadcast live on major TV networks, including ABC, CBS, Fox and NBC. It will also be shown on C-SPAN, CNN, Fox News and MSNBC.

ABC News and Facebook are partnering to broadcast the debate, as well as commentary before and after, live on the social media platform. 

Other livestreams of the debate will be available on ABC News, Buzzfeed News, CBS News, CNN, C-SPAN, The Daily Caller, Fox News, Hulu, Huffington Post, NBC, PBS, Politico, Telemundo, The Wall Street Journal, Twitter, Univision, Yahoo and YouTube.

Nope. None. It really will be bigger than the Super Bowl. At least, there'll be more ways to watch it. I'm just guessing C-SPAN will have the most boring production, so that's the one I'll watch. I am watching with the sound off – I mean it – and C-SPAN seems as good a place as any to do that.

I really don't know why, but this headline cracks me up


Wells Fargo CEO resigns from advisory role with the Federal Reserve
The Washington Post

Read the full story


Picky, picky


Trump vows to 'utterly destroy ISIS' — but he won't say how
The Washington Post

Read the full story


That's a pretty big improvement


Lady Gaga reportedly will, in fact, perform at Super Bowl LI halftime show
The Washington Post

Read the full story

The LI, I mean. (Are they called digits? Places? Just plain old letters?) Whatever—at least it's better than XXVVIVCXXVI, which is positively indecipherable. Sure, I don't know what LI means either, but at least it saves ink.

Wait, ink?

Maybe next year we should call it LI.2 and be done with it. 

9.24.2016

Is Elizabeth Warren bugging out?

Sure, she gave that Wells Fargo CEO a hard time and he richly deserved it. That’s good.

But here’s the thing. That scandal at the bank, which involved more than 5,000 employees, exitended over five years—five years—while all the time the government was telling us what a great thing it was to bail out the banking industry with taxpayer money and, not tp worry, the Congress and the regulators were making sure those nice banks would never misbehave again and so, well, sure a lot of people lost jobs and houses and pensions but never mind, it was worth it. Meanwhile, there was Wells Fargo picking the suckers’ pockets with both hands. What words does Ms. Warren have for the Congress and the regulators and the whole, sacrosanct Obama Administration on this subject?

I’m hearing crickets.

FBI Friday is not a restaurant in the 'burbs

Obama used pseudonym to talk with Hillary on private server | New York Post

It’s sort of touching, really. The cluelessness of it all. Boneheaded, but cute. Too bad they weren’t using secret decoder rings as well.

Clearly, Obama knew Clinton’s server was insecure. Why else would he feel the need for a disguise? And apparently he thought using a code name would obscure his real identity; How well did that work out?

The Lesser of Two Evils is not good enough.

Saturday

I crashed my back a few days ago and I've been hobbling around on a stick ever since. It's getting better. But maybe it would get better better if I just stayed off it for the rest of the weekend. So I made myself a vat of pea soup, laid in some chips and peanut butter cookies, and I'm settling in to—well, I hesitate to admit this but as long as I'm being all confessional and stuff—settling in to watch UMASS play football later this afternoon.

If you're interested, it's at 3:30 PM Real time on ESPN37 or 38, I don't remember which. If you're not, I understand.

The horror! (No, the Onion.)

9.23.2016

Wait, what?

When Does A Presidential Candidate’s Mental Health Matter? 

 

There's always The Tweak

UPS testing drones for use in its package delivery system - Western Mass News - WGGB/WSHM

"Newly revised federal aviation regulations don't permit commercial drones to fly over people not involved in their operations and require them to remain within line of sight of their operators, effectively rendering commercial deliveries impossible. Drone-makers are working with regulators to tweak existing rules."

Otherwise this is pretty cool, no? They can drone something to my place any time they want to. 

Siri is starting to remind me of some kid who works at a fast-food shop

OK, I confess: I ask Siri to set the timer on my iPhone when I’m making tea. There. I said it and I’m glad.

Siri, however, has difficulty parsing the instruction, “Set a timer for four minutes.” It somehow thinks—not always but very often—I’m saying for Foreman.

So we have this exchange:

ME: Set a timer for four minutes.

SIRI: For how long?

See what I mean?

9.22.2016

Pretty impressive there, Siri

I dictated the headline to the previous post (see below): "And it's on its way here!" Siri got both the itses right, first try. That's an A.

And it's on its way here!

Let's run with it!

It seems to be happening again

Now I'm going to have to recharge my shoes too?

Nike's Self-Tying Trainers Finally Have A Release Date from Esquire Style's Tweet

Available for try-on and purchase appointments starting on November 28, the HyperAdapt 1.0 uses a pressure sensor, a rechargeable lithium-polymer battery…

Seriously? If the power goes down, I'll have to walk to my electric car in my bare feet?

Dementia?

You say that like it's a bad thing

Mercy

We're No. 1!

No pressure though


Rookie quarterbacks everywhere are making their mark. Except No. 1 pick Jared Goff.
The Washington Post

It wasn't supposed to be a year of first-year signal-callers in the NFL, but it's quickly turning out that way. With one notable exception. Read the full story


9.21.2016

What if they held an election and nobody showed up?

Sweet: Focus group on Trump, Clinton: 'The public hates both' | Chicago Sun-Times

"I was observing a focus group in Alexandria, a suburb in the battleground state of Virginia, just a few miles from the White House."

[The Sweet in this story is the excellent Chicago Sun-Times political reporter Lynn Sweet.]

This is pretzel making at its finest


Wells Fargo has one heck of a scandal on its hands
Business Insider

Wells Fargo CEO John Stumpf testifies to the Senate banking committee. Win McNamee/Getty Images Wells Fargo CEO John Stumpf endured a nearly three-hour questioning from the US Senate banking committee on Tuesday. Stumpf was constantly taken to task by senators, both Democratic and Republican, for the scandal in which Wells Fargo employees opened roughly 2 million checking and credit accounts without customers' knowledge. 

Stumpf also has a difficult task before him: showing that he is accountable without bearing the brunt of the blame.

Essentially, Stumpf's argument is that he accepts responsibility for the scandal, but that senior executives did not create a culture that encouraged the type of behavior that led to employees opening 2 million false accounts.

Read the full story

Look those knots!

Everything—everything, Bunky—is a marketing opportunity (Get your free trial bottle now)

Fox News: Dr Recommended ED Permanent Solution for All Men

 

Oh, horsefeathers

What fresh hell is this, said Dorothy Parker.

I have gone from not being able to remember people's names to not being able to remember people, when I know their names. This morning it took me a full two minutes to recover who Andy Warhol is. He isn't, it turns out, but he was. Some art guy.

This is a whole new level of depressing.

This guy should get into politics

Exploding Galaxy Note 7 phones are apparently Apple's fault | New York Post

All of the chatter ahead of Apple's new iPhone launch suggested that this year's new iPhone lineup was going to be boring and dull. As a result, Samsung thought it could rush out the new Galaxy Note 7 and steal Apple's thunder with a gorgeous design and some hot new features like a built-in iris scanner.
https://goo.gl/ftCGn3

I've been having flashbacks

Hard-partying finance crook pardoned by Clinton facing new accusations | New York Post

Edward Downe Jr., the New York bon vivant who was convicted of insider trading and then secured a controversial presidential pardon from Bill Clinton, is being accused of financial impropriety again.

9.20.2016

Oh no! (And I'm not talking about Brangelina here.)

I am reliably informed by a commercial on CNN that said network plans to begin its Live Coverage! of Monday next's First Presidential Debate! at 4:00 PM Eastern time, otherwise known in these parts as Real time when the actual live event CNN will be Live Covering! doesn't itself begin until 9. That's five freaking hours of pre-live Live Covering!, in case you were wondering. Blather, in other words.

Really.

It's bad enough…

Bills would defend consumers' right to leave bad reviews

"That's in response to some businesses that have made customers sign non-disparagement clauses and then sued if a bad review showed up."

…that Congress gets involved in passing laws about Yelping. (Do you yelp? I don’t pay much attention to it myself because keeping my various dining options sorted out does not require high-end technological assistance.) 

But the idea idea that people are being asked to sign non-disparagement contracts while ordering a burger, or whatever other yelpable activity they’re engaged in, is freaking priceless. 

It's a twofer!

Former President George H. W. Bush will vote for Hillary Clinton - NY Daily News

"'The President told me he’s voting for Hillary,' wrote Kennedy, Robert F. Kennedy's oldest child, in an apparently private Facebook post obtained by Politico."

Another Clinton and another Bush! Same package. And all tied up by another Kennedy. 

Be still my heart.